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Primary education

Join our Primary Education forum to discuss starting school and helping your child get the most out of it.

Any anxious mums of dc's starting school come this way :)

27 replies

elmofan · 25/08/2010 17:45

My DD (4.7yrs) is starting school next Wednesday & although she went to Montessori school she had to be taken from me crying each morning & sometimes she would get herself into such a state her teacher would ask me to take her back home :(
None of her friends from pre-school are going to her new school so I'm expecting a rough time settling her .

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elmofan · 25/08/2010 18:42

Anyone?

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moonminmama · 25/08/2010 18:46

My ds was 4 YESTERDAY!!! He starts school in September. He's really looking forwardmto it but I have to admit. I am a little nervous!

elmofan · 25/08/2010 19:20

Aww he has only just turned 4 , its terrible that they have to start school so young IMO .

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spanieleyes · 25/08/2010 19:24

Why?
Each child is different, my youngest has his birthday on 16th August and was 4 and two weeks when he started, he was desperate to go to school and loved Reception, he spent all his time in the water tray and had a great timeGrin

Lizzylou · 25/08/2010 19:27

DS2 starts school in a few weeks, he seemed so ready for school last year but now he seems very wary and has regressed into babytalk etc. He loves his childminder though so that may have something to do with it. He will be fine, he knows 3/4 of his class already and his brother will be in Yr2.

Moon, one of my neighbour's sons started school a week after his 4th birthday and he was fine. He is now in Yr 4!

I think it will be me who is the most upset, my baby is off to school!

grizzlyhair · 25/08/2010 19:27

My DD1 (just turned 4) is starting school next week and doesn't know anyone due to a recent house move. She is not ready at all IMO, still struggles with a lot of basic stuff, such as toileting, and not been interested in learning any letters etc. I am absolutely gutted that she has to go to school too early, I'm feeling very emotional about it. I just keep thinking 'why didn't I plan things better...if only I had had her a month later, and she would have that extra year at home'

plus3 · 25/08/2010 19:32

god I agree. I am desolate at the idea of DD (4.2) starting. I thought that she would be ok, but we have had meltdowns about wearing the uniform, refusing to try to get dressed by herself and not wanting to try to wipe her own bottom. She is also currently hideous when tired!!!!

She went to a Montessori, and will probably be more than capable with the (minimal) academic stuff.

Lizzylou · 25/08/2010 19:35

Oh Grizzly, she will be fine, I am sure.

Reception is fab, just an extension of nursery and my DS2 is awful at getting dressed etc, he has also started wetting himself again recently.

The first time my DS1's reception class did PE was hilarious at the school gates, jumpers/trousers on back to front, shoes on wrong feet etc.

She will love it and my DS1 was friends with "new" boys who he didn't know before he joined reception.
It is a new environment and new for all of the children.
DS2 starts on 13th Sept, I'll have the hankies waiting for you next week if you do the same for me??? Smile

sailorsgal · 25/08/2010 19:41

My ds 4.1 starts on the 8th. They do full days aswell which will be hard.

He was in the nursery attached to the school so it won't be such a shock and he knows most of the class already.

Still can't believe it though, and don't know what I will do with myself. Grin

plus3 · 25/08/2010 19:44

will certainly send a hankie your way Lizzylou.

Told a single friend that I wasn't sure what I was going to do with myself once both DC were at school and she told me I was being bloody stupid!!! Which was nice !

elmofan · 25/08/2010 20:43

DD has also been wetting herself lots this week ,
grizzly try not to worry , im sure she will be fine .... i just wish they didn't have to start school until they were sixteen six Grin

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grizzlyhair · 25/08/2010 20:57

Thanks...it is so hard not to worry, and then I worry about passing on the worry. She has become bad at going to sleep now, with over an hour of calling out and crying most nights. Its hard when they're the youngest ones as well. She never really liked nursery either and it was always a struggle to get her there. i think part of the problem is that she is very quiet and shy and prefers playing by herself than with others; she will always follow others. Sorry I'm twittering now.... What a shame parents can't choose to defer a year into reception

LackingInspiration · 25/08/2010 21:00

They don't have to start school so young! They don't ever have to start school if you don't think it's the best thing for them. They have to start having an education the term after they start five. If she's not ready, don't send her yet - can't be good for her to be so distressed.

elmofan · 25/08/2010 21:13

grizzly you have described my dd . She refuses to go to sleep until i lie beside her & still takes 2hours + to fall to sleep if i leave the room at all she screams . DD is also my youngest . DD has eczema & asthma so gets a lot of chest / skin infections when mixing with other children so reckon we are in for a rough year .
Does your dd start on Wednesday ?

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giveitago · 25/08/2010 21:23

Elmo - you might find she likes school more?

My ds went to a private nursery part time when I was working. He progressively didn't like it - nothing wrong with the place and he wasn't distressed but he didn't like many of the kids and he was getting bored with the same people.

I moved him to the local state nursery (attached the school he's staring in sept) and he loved it there.

For me some of it was the fact that the private nursery wasn't in our area so at weekends etc we would never bump into anyone we knew. Now his does since the state nursery - so give your little dd a chance -I hear the schools are very gentle in introducing the kids to reception and from what I've seen the first year or two is like nursery in terms of play.

Having said that - I'm not looking forward to ds starting school as in many ways he's not ready (dressing and also standing up for himself) but in others he's way too independent and it saddens me (she says clinging on desperately to her ds).

Ensure your dd reall enjoys the last few days of the holidays and talk to the teachers about your concerns - they will have seen it all.

jacquettamay · 25/08/2010 21:39

My little boy is 4 this weekend. I don't really think it's sunk it that he goes to school next week. I think he will be ok as he's quite sociable. What does strike me though, when we're out with others, is that even good friends don't make allowance for the fact that he's 3 months younger than most of his friendship group. He is pretty much expected by many to keep up in terms of what is expected behaviourally. I also get a bit fed up with dcs of friends nearly a year older boasting to my little one that they can ride their bike without stabilisers, write their name etc. Mothers look on proudly, however there is no comparison between a five year riding a bike without stabilisers and a nearly four year old nearly doing it. Guess I need to take a chill pill - years of this to come I imagine!
I really hope his teachers appreciate this however, some I've met don't fill me with much confidence.

elmofan · 25/08/2010 21:46

Thanks giveitago Smile

Ive been talking about how great school is to dd all day today & she seems very excited . Long may that last Grin
DD's school is not in my local area unfortunately . But yes we plan to enjoy our last few days before school starts .

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IwishIwasmoreorganised · 25/08/2010 21:56

I think we'll be ok.

DS1 has done 5 terms of 1/2 days in meithrin (nursery) in his school, and the meithrin and derbyn (reception) do a lot together so apart for taking a packed lunch and staying for the afternoon, there's not too much of a change.

He'll go through the same door to get in, there'll be loads of kids he knows, same uniform, teachers and assistants that he had during his first 2 terms, the list goes on.

It's me that's a bit sad that my pfb is going full time!

Nemofish · 25/08/2010 22:10

My dd is starting on 7th Sept.

She says that she doesn't want to go, and doesn't want to learn writing, but is starting to write her name (3 letters!) and is always asking what this or that says, but if you try to lead her into doing anything educational she spots it from a mile off and will refuse point blank unless the mood takes her Angry Ah well Smile

She loves being around other children though and makes friends very easily.

It still makes me cry though, because I see that she is a much happier, more confident and sunnier child than I was at her age - at least I have done something right! Smile Sad Smile Confused

Hai1988 · 26/08/2010 12:16

My DS will be 5 and 2 days when he starts on the 6th Sept.

Even though he will be one of the oldest I still cant help but worry, he's still my baby.

It doesn't help that in the last couple of days he's been in the wars, has carpet burn on his nose and forehead, and a wobbley tooth from falling out of bed and hes going to have to go to school like this so not good.

elmofan · 26/08/2010 12:53

Awww hai1988 lol your poor ds , i know what you mean about them still being babies . We've got six days left until school .
nemofish lol your dd sounds like great fun Grin with a mind of her own .
DD can write her own name (5 letters) but thats about it . The things is though at this age they learn through play so her teacher will be making things fun so it wont feel like hard work iykwim.

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hatsybatsy · 26/08/2010 13:26

dd is 4.1 and starts next thursday - she can't wait to put the uniform and be going into reception (after a year doing mornings in nursery) - but we will be a bit sad to see her off. that's just us being sentimental though as she's the baby. she will be fine!

Spingsummer · 26/08/2010 13:39

I did not like my school years. The teachers had favourite pupils, often the children of the other teachers. Life at school seemed so unfair. I hope it is not like that anymore. My DS is going to be 5 in October and I have no idea how is he going to cope with it; he starts his foundation next week. He is still asking me to wipe his bottom. I just hope he does not ask a teacher :) I am sure he will not but I hope the teachers make sure the kids wash their hands after the loo.

systemsaddict · 27/08/2010 10:07

My son's 4th birthday today and his last day at nursery, he starts school 6th September. I'm sure he's academically and socially ready - he's been full time in nursery for a long time - but isn't properly toilet trained yet, he has done only 2 poos in the toilet in the past month! His teacher had an August-born child apparently so I am hoping she will be understanding ....

elmofan · 27/08/2010 10:45

Aww Happy birthday Systemsaddict's ds Smile

I'm getting more anxious as the days go by tbh . Although dd came into the bedroom this morning asking if she could start school today .

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