Reception prize day

[Ixia]

What do you make of Reception children being included in prize day? Some of DD's class have been given books, for good work, most improved reading etc at a proper prize giving ceremony for R, Y1 and Y2. DD is absolutley gutted (floods of tears at home time) about it and doesn't really understand why she didn't get a book as she's been good and worked hard. TBH it really spoilt her last day in reception, which is a shame as she has loved it up until now.

Am I being over protective? My Mum has said that kids have to learn there are others better than them. But I feel this is too harsh at 5 (in fact some of the class are still 4), I've worked hard to improve her confidence and this feels like a kick in the teeth.

I don't subscribe to the nobody should win culture, it's the age I object to, they have just completed their first year at school, it's a big step where they have all just been finding their feet. The kids all sang two summery songs, the first was all smiles, the second after the prize giving was far more subdued, some of the reception class looked bewildered and obviously didn't comprehend.

My daughter got a glowing school report, much praise for the work she'd put in with her speech therapy. She doesn't understand how she can have done well, but not won a prize. It's be made doubly hard by the fact that she also missed out on all the team treats as well. Her view is that she hasn't done well. I can't make her young brain understand that, that is not true. I'd have preferred them all to have got a certificate and a handshake, there's no need to make up daft reasons, just completing reception would have been enough. When they are older they will be aware of the pecking order anyway and will have much more comprehension.

One of the other mothers, whose reception child won a prize, commented that her older daughter despite being a lovely girl and model student has never won anything in 3yrs , you'd think they'd at least even it out over the years.

Btw, I'd feel the same way even if DD had won a prize, one of her friends was really upset - twas hideous and has just left a sour taste after such a lovely year. Just smacks of building the kids up then knocking them down - gah.

Well you might feel differently later - they are no less tender when they are age 8. My dd has not won an academic prize in 4 years of schooling. and whilst I can't expect her to scoop up best in literacy (she is dyslexic) etc, I would have anticipated a prize for effort - or for the improvements in reading she has made (she now has a reading age one year in advance of her chronological age which is no mean feat for a dyslexic child).

My problem is the lack of objectivity in awarding prizes. In my experience teachers have 'favourites' and it is pretty darned obvious who they are. There are other children (usually the quite, unobtrusive and diligent ones) who get completely overlooked

I am not sure about prizes really. It is lovely for some children but, as the person who has to choose the prizewinners, I can honestly say that some children do get left out and I can see that it hurts them. In a way its a sad way to end a primary year. I always tell all the children in my classes that there were several candidates and in the end I had to choose just one - so I had to just pick that person based on recent performance. I make it clear that all the other candidates deserved a prize too and tell the truth, which is that I often change my mind several times.

One year, in a previous school, the headteacher happened to get a job lot of books so we gave a book to every child. We all stood up at the front and talked about each child's positive qualities. It took hours but the children were really motivated at the start of the next school year.

Hmc I suspect I will feel it's just as awful in a couple of years time, just hoping that DD won't

alicante Your last paragraph says it all really.

Ixia unfortunately they cotton on more to unfairness etc as they get older and definitely get more competitive not less

Fwiw re the attendance thing - I teach in an Infants school and we have recently started rewarding children with stickers for 100% attendance over a term. This was not our choice. When we wre visited by Ofsted we were deemed to be an outstanding school. The only two things we were graded good for were healthy eating and attendance - two things which are really out of the school's control . The headteacher is not one of those who will ban all treats in lunchboces but they told us we had to do something anout attendance, which incidently is not that bad for the area. The only suggestion they could give us was to start rewarding children for 100% attendance whcih we now do and we also have two trophies - winner and runner-up - for the classes which have the best attendance each week. It is really, really harsh on those children who are genuinely ill but it is designed to give a kick up the nbum to those who can't be bothered to come to school and parents have to understand that sometimes the schools are forced into it.

"They must understand that not everyone can win from party games, surely?"

That's an extremely weak analogy. Winners in party games tend to be a bit random, whereas prize giving is tied up with recognition and self esteem. Quite a different thing

I'm all for the attendance reward - my poor overlooked dd might actually fecking win something then

"They must understand that not everyone can win from party games, surely?"

A party game or any game is a 10min window in time, with the chance to try again 2mins later. A whole year of effort is a different matter.

Lol HMC, my daughter wouldn't have a chance there either, especially as the school sent her home poorly 3x last year!

In reception every child should be given a certificate.

My experience is that you need to make children want to try.

This is going to sound odd but it's a bit like habitual gamblers most of whom have experience of early success - little children need to have a success to know what that feels like.

With tinies failure makes them give up.

When a child has experience of working for something and being rewarded subsequent 'failures' will tend to make them try harder to recover this feeling of success. I just find they need to get the experience of success first.

I think, on balance, for little ones I agree with forehead.

IMO there is no need to reward everyone or anyone in the class. Reception is far too young for Awards, in fact I'd suggest that the whole of Infant school should be more about nurture rather than competition between peers.

Giving a certificate to every child isn't patronising in my opinion, my TA & I pick a quality about each child that we feel should be praised & encouraged. Personally I feel every child needs to be valued & praised for a specific thing-something that's true, not something I've made up just to put on a certificate.
Some children's biggest achievement in reception is to let Mummy/Daddy/whoever go in the morning & come into school happily, some kids do smile every day & tackle everything with enthusiasm, I would rather be honest & praise that than put 'tried hard with phonics tasks'
I agree that very young children need constant nurturing & feeling they're valued as individuals, leaving someone out would leave me feeling very uncomfortable. Sorry

I did not like my school years because of the unfair treatment many times. I think those years were really harsh, psychologically.

My son used to go to a nursery school this year. I once was standing in the corridor of the nursery making him ready to go home then a teacher told in front of us to another mum about her daughter: "Oh, this is my favourite one". I was just shocked. I still cannot forget it. How can you tell it in front of another child or did she not realise there was someone else there? Even though, a teacher should not tell such thing to a pupil. I wanted to complain about her but then I just left it. All this favouritism during the nursery-school years makes lots of kids cry.

I think every child should get a reward for both doing something outstanding and for trying. I think a child who did not do well academically would have been very pleased to get for example a little nice present (even a tiny one). He or she will know that if they get better academically they will receive a bigger, more expensive reward. The same child who did not do well academically could do very well in PE receiving a great reward this time. If a child is not doing well in any subject than he/she needs a specific reward which would encourage her/him to do better. But I am sure that almost every child is good in something.

I know the school might think it is going to be so costly for us but then you do not need to buy presents in Harrods.

So, I wanted to tell that a clever teacher will give all children a reward and make them feel special and clever.

I think children should not get rewards for going to school. They have to attend the school. Some children cannot attend because of an illness and what then? Would you give them a present for a nice try? A school and the class teacher have to make sure and learn from other excellent teachers (from other schools) how to make the pupils want to attend the lessons. Every subject can be interesting if you present it well, with an interest.

When I was a pupil the kids did not receive any presents excepts Christmas ones and certificates of excellence (all subjects marked As). That was it. I would have been happy to get a book as a reward.