Anyone else’s suddenly get hit with grief for your child’s younger years?! 💔

[Tinkeringg]

Anyone else’s suddenly get hit with grief for your child’s younger years?! 💔

Grief is a very strong word, and I would say for me it’s a huge wave of nostalgia that gives me a lump in my throat for a few minutes.

I’m in the process of trying to declutter toys and books, and I feel sadness at knowing most of the toys will be gone forever in the next few months. But I can’t honestly call it grief.

We’re fingers crossed past the worst of puberty, and there are good things to look forward to.

@Tinkeringg how old are your DC?

Yes you’re right - it’s not grief. But a sadness and longing and missing. My girl is 11 and also have a one year old baby boy. I just miss even a few years ago. She’s like a mini teenager now and the little girl I was so fond of and treasured for so long, is gone. And mostly I’m fine but sometimes I look at her And wonder where my little girl with the fuzzy plaits went?!

Not grief but yes a bit of nostalgia and a sudden realisation that they were children and in a blink they are going to adults. Panic that I thought I'd have more time with them.

Honestly no. I had two DC 15 months apart and I found it very hard work. They are now 22 and 21 and I much prefer having older DC to younger.

Yes. Ds is 21 and today has said yes to a house share in another city. He’s been away to uni but he’s never before had a full on different address. Also he’s enormous - a proper full scale male gym bunny. I adore this stage and of course it’s exciting but my darling little curly headed boy was only here a few minutes ago…

Two dc, now 12 and 14. I struggled a couple of summers ago, where I realised that all the activities that we used to do, the country parks, castles and trips to the beach were no longer wanted. Last Christmas and this year I have learnt to adapt and we have done more adventure days out, like theme parks. I do miss them being small and needing/wanting me in a different way but I’m finding new ways to experience life with them.

We're currently clearing the loft which mostly consists of baby/toddler clothes, shoes, teddies, blankets, toys etc It's very nostalgic and giving so many memories. So many, "but how did the younger two end up 11 already, and the big girls nearly adults, I'm sure that was not long ago he/she wore/used that".

I had so much fun with my 4 when they were little, still do now of course but it's very different. It's mostly football matches, gigs, musicals nowadays where of course you don't interact a whole lot during.

I like to do dds paper round with her sometimes just to spend time with her.

Yes, 12yr old here and I get pangs at times! I don’t quibble over the word grief tbh, I think grief is woven through life at various depths - passing of seasons, eras, loved ones etc.

I wish someone had told me they’re really only children for 10 years! I think I might have enjoyed the intensity of the childhood years a bit more if I’d known it would be over so quickly.

Yes! And for some reason I’ve twisted their early childhood in my head into this awful time for them and that it wasn’t good enough.

I totally get this now I’m a mum, but as someone who’s mum said this kind of thing to her a lot, please don’t! The little girl is still there and kids that age often feel SO small inside. Don’t be fooled by the increasingly gangling limbs ❤️

Oh God yes. I burst into tears at the weekend remembering doing something very dumb with baby ds. It was 20 years ago.

Nostalgia not grief yes they growing up so fast