Detention every week

[WHYohwhy12]

My son is in year 8. He's been getting 3 detentions a week for talking out in class. The tutor told him they would ring me. Any tips on what to do? He's on the waiting list to be addressed for ADHD (the NHS also said for autism after they looked at his paperwork from his primary school teacher) .
I'm not really sure what I'm meant to do. He does the detentions fine and just does his homework during them
Any advice please
Thanks

Remove something he wants every time he gets a detention. Xbox/phone. This gives a consequence to the action that means something to him.

I would suggest to the tutor that the detentions are pointless as they are not changing his behaviour. I would happily work with school, but they clearly need to look at how they manage his behaviour in the classroom.

This simply won’t work though if he has ND. Yes, you still need to guide him but ND DC simply don’t respond to traditional methods of discipline in the same way ND DC do.

Does he have an ECHP yet @WHYohwhy12and what allowances are the school making for him so far.

And how does he do on this simple progress checker?

ND children don’t respond to discipline the same way NT children do. And x-box/phone can be essential for self regulation (and adhd/asd combinations are hard in the kids).
i would start with how he can stop interrupting. one of mine has a silent fiddle toy (agreed with teacher if course) that comes out to overcome the urge to shout out.
I would get the senco involved to help him manage hus behaviour.

Are his current teachers aware that your son is on a waiting list to be assessed?

If not, I would make an appointment with their form teacher or head of year and explain the situation. They might be more understanding. How do you discipline him at home? Maybe suggest they use a similar approach as that might work better than handing out detentions that are obviously not working

What form does the talking in class take?
Is he bothered by the detentions?
How long do you have to wait for the assessment and are his teachers aware you’re doing this?
Are there any strategies/support that the school have implemented so far to try and help?

Is there a pattern as to which lessons this is occurring in?
Would changing the seating plan help? e.g. putting him in the front row next to a window?

Thanks everyone for you responses. His head is year said it's low level disruption - talking etc. He doesn't care about the detentions in the sense that they don't worry him and he does them fine. The next course of action is he's going on green report and he will get a longer detention. He did get one for not handing homework in (at lunch time) but they removed that one. She said there didn't seem to be a pattern as to why the disruption occurred (not same lesson etc) . He was referred in year six for assessment and there's a minimum 3 year waiting list according to the response I got from the NHS. I don't know if his teachers are aware (you would think they would be) when he got the letter from the NHS last year I emailed the senco and she said she would pass the info on.

@WHYohwhy12 have a chat with the senco and highlight the urgency - they can put help in place without a diagnosis!

I would suggest emailing the teachers that give him detention to see exactly what effect his disruption has on the class and what kind of behaviours he displays . Since he’s not getting detention in every lesson, does that mean he manages to control himself in some lessons , or do some teachers let it go?

What support has the SENCO suggested in school? Email again to make sure the information is available, and if his behaviour is not terrible/massively disruptive maybe they should consider letting some stuff go? The lack of a diagnosis now, doesn’t mean they can just shrug their shoulders and do nothing. Detentions obviously don’t work.

Is he not bothered about detention because it gives him time and space to get on with his homework and also that it’s a calm, quiet space?

How are things now @WHYohwhy12?

If his behaviour is a result of his ND, which is very likely then he has no or little control over it so punishment won’t help him change some thing he can’t change.

Make an appointment with the SENCO and ideally head of year too. Nake sure you read their vision statement (we want every child to achieve their best blah, blah) and their SEN policy. Quote the relevant section of their SEN policy at them and ask what reasonable adjustments they can put in place. Have a list of things you would like to see. He should be on SEN register. You can consider applying for ECHNA - there are lots of suggestions this is going to get more difficult in the future so do it now.

Thanks for your response. The senco left and they have a new ont who I emailed last week but heard nothing so far. They are now putting him on report for having two detentions in a week. Looking at the report he'd getting crosses for turning round, talking out of turn not focussing.

The problem is that he does not think it is his problem.

You need to make his behaviour a problem for him.

Back up the school. If he gets a detention at school, he must suffer some kind of negative consequence at home as well.

On the other hand, encourage and reward him, where appropriate, where he does well.

What is he doing so far to help him focus?