Bullying

[dontcallmebruh]

Hi I am looking for advice please. My dd is 12 and has just started high school. For the last 3 weeks or so she has been getting bullied by 2 girls, I have been to the school but they won't help because my dd refuses to tell anybody what they are saying to her, the only thing she will say is that it's about her weight and the way she looks. She is crying everyday in school and begging me to come and pick her up.

Today things got worse, in her first class when the teacher decided to have a conversation with the class about who was the most annoying, the most popular etc when he got to who is the ugliest one of the boys pointed to my daughter and said her, the whole class laughed at her. She went to the bathroom to cry. I went to the school again and they said that the teacher will be spoken to.

She is having such a hard time and I am trying to help her but she will not tell anybody what these 2 girls are saying to her so nobody can really do anything. I should also add that my dd has been through some awful things in the last few years and I am really worried about her mental health. If anyone has any advice on how best to support her or encourage her to speak to someone about what's happening at school I would be very grateful. Thank you for reading.

If things are this bad so early on then I’d seriously start looking at some new schools ASAP. That teacher is totally out of line - I’d be making a formal complaint. None of this is acceptable in the slightest, any bullying should be taken 100% seriously, no matter if your DD wants to tell them exactly what was said or not. Poor girl!

Even if your daughter did speak up nothing would change. Your best bet is to make sure other parents know what the teacher was talking about in class so you make a group complaint.
Basically you will need to pull your child out. I wasted 6 months dragging my kid to school and trying to work with the school before pulling the plug. During this time her anxiety went through the roof and I’m still dealing with it 5 years later.

Your poor DD, and poor you. It's so difficult and upsetting . I would continue to report to school , have you direct contact with the year head? I would email every day if necessary- don't be afraid to make a nuisance of yourself .
In the meantime continue to offer love, support and a listening ear at home . Does she have any friends outside of school? If so arrange a meet up or get her into an outside school club of some sort . So sorry OP- kids are arseholes sometimes and as for that teacher - shocking and completely unacceptable x

Do you check her phone (if she has one?) Is there anything that they say via WhatsApp or anything that you could go off?
I'm so sorry it's heartbreaking when your child is going through this.
Also why on earth was the teacher talking about who was the ugliest????