Should I try to persuade dd (11) to eat breakfast or just back off?

[dameofdilemma]

Dd (11) has never been picky with food, never routinely skipped meals etc. She's a healthy weight etc.

Since starting secondary this week she's refused breakfast - never happened before, in fact she's always been most hungry first thing in the morning.
She says she just doesn't feel like it. She has a say in what she has for breakfast (within reason, relatively healthy etc).

She says she likes secondary - has friends there she knows from primary and locally. Never had any issues with school generally.

Should I just leave it for now? I've always thought breakfast is the most important meal for school kids....

Maybe she's just feeling a bit anxious in the morning if it's her first week of secondary school? It's hard to eat when you're anxious. She'll probably get back to normal once she settles in a bit.

My 13 year old dd is doing this too. It makes me crazy thinking she'll get hungry before lunch. I've tried not to make a big deal and slowly she's asking for a little something. I think as long as your dd is still eating other meals it's OK. It's so hard with girls because you are always worried it's a body image thing when they are just perfect as they are

I buy cereal bars so at least my daughter eats something. Then I make sure she eats breakfast at the weekend when she can get up a bit later (really not a morning person!)

My sons just started too, he’s never eaten breakfast but I’ve put money on his card and he’s buying a croissant every day at first break so I know he’s eating something

My DS is the same, stopped coming down for breakfast when he started secondary school, I didn’t like it, but just made sure there was something he could grab and eat on the way available. He is very skinny but eats like a horse in the evening. I think it’s a shift in eating patterns and maybe linked to the fact he no longer likes getting up in the morning, body just on a later schedule than it was as a young kid.

I agree that offering her a breakfast bar to take to school, and a homemade smoothie or banana milkshake, or a latte made with full fat milk, could be a good compromise.

I did make dc eat breakfast or packed it for them to take, as their secondary was a good half hour train ride from our village.

It might be the weather. I find it difficult to eat breakfast when it is hot.

Is she buying bacon rolls from the canteen at breakfast or morning snack? Or buying stuff from the shop?

Ime where children get cash (no idea if you give cash or they have a prepay school card) they completely change what they eat and when.

Especially when they know they are getting a decent healthy dinner!

I quite often don't eat breakfast and yet some mornings I'm starving and eat a huge breakfast. The weather definitely effects it.

Plus change in timings. For example has she laid in over the summer and does she get up earlier for this school than she did primary?

I'd back off for now but keep a quiet eye out for signs of skipping other meals or changes in eating habits stater school.

No doubt her routine has changed with secondary school. Is she having to leave earlier and so have breakfast earlier? Is she under more pressure to remember what to take so doesn't feel she has time for breakfast? Are all of her friends getting some food on the way to school or at school and she wants to join them? I'd back off too.
I always thought breakfast was the most important meal of the day. Then I met DH who hadn't had breakfast since he was about 7 as he just doesn't get hungry in the morning. Then I did intermittent fasting and breakfast was the easiest meal to skip. It really hasn't made a difference!

One if mine never had breakfast at secondary. Even though school was fine she needed time to get her head in the game before she ate. Not healthy but I used to give her a cheapo supermarket croissant and she ate it when she got there or at break. She's a supremely picky eater (probably ARFID but not diagnosed) so you could probably give yours something way better if she usually enjoys the healthier options.

Also even if she's enjoying school it's possible it's still leaving her feeling a bit heightened which could affect her appetite.

I stopped eating breakfast at about that age and I haven’t eaten it since. I’m a normal BMI I’m fit and healthy and I naturally only really eat between 12 and 7 each day. I’ve never been on a diet. I eat healthily but still eat pizza/chocolate etc.

Ask her if she would like an apple or yoghurt or something healthy etc for break?

One of my kids is starting to refuse breakfast (she is far younger), I’ve just offered plain Greek yoghurt and berries and nuts which she is okay with some days, the other days I ask if she’d like extra lunch - which she eats. She isn’t a picky eater at all.

My dd did the same when she started secondary. I put it down to tiredness in the mornings and always gave her something to snack on for the bus once she felt more awake.

She's just starting secondary school.
She's highly likely to be nervous which can affect appetite

Make sure she takes a snack for break time or has sufficient funds to buy food at break time.

Personally I wouldn't worry too much about making sure she has a healthy breakfast, I'd just want her to get some calories inside her!

I always made sure mine had a cereal bar in their bag just in case.

Is there any evidence for the "breakfast being the most important meal of the day" thing? Or was it invented by Kellogg's?

Neither of my teen DCs have eaten breakfast for a few years & I never made a big deal out of it. I havent eaten breakfast for most of my life as I cant stomach food first thing in the morning either.

However DH and my DM could both have a 3 course dinner within 30 minutes of waking up which I cant fathom at all.

Different strokes for different folks

I’m the same! I’m not hungry in the morning but I’ve been having to eat to take my medication and it just makes me more hungry!

First week back nerves maybe??

I never used to eat breakfast. I have IBS and was always struggling to get out of the house due to needing to go back to the loo a few times. I did at primary but not at secondary. It basically cut out that trigger for me. As an adult now I know it was triggered the due to eating cereal with milk and having a lactose intolerance! It was also triggered by nerves - I still get an upset tummy when nervous. I usually took something like a cereal bar to have at break time when I was feeling more hungry and was usually less anxious by then. As an adult I now take my breakfast to eat at work!!

I make sure mine have a drink before school. Usually they eat breakfast but their secondary also has breakfast to buy so sometimes they will do that - I’ve said not daily though as it’s expensive.

Also one of my DDs loses appetite sometimes around when her period is due.

Presumably she's been having breakfast later in the holidays, and she's just not ready to eat before leaving now.

I've never been able to eat first thing. When I worked, I took a cereal bar and an apple or instant porridge, to have when I got there. If I was made to eat too early I'd feel really sick.

So leave her alone, and give her a banana or something to take with her.

My son LOVES his breakfast, but this week (first week at secondary) he's not been able to eat breakfast. He's feeling really anxious and nervous about school every morning and says he feels light headed and sick in the mornings. He makes up for it as soon as he comes home though.

If you're certain she's eating lunch, then leave it. My teen DD won't eat at school so a big, very nutritious breakfast is mandatory.

I'd offer her non-breakfast foods, in case she'd rather eat a cheese sandwich or reheated leftovers, but otherwise let her be. I'd keep a quiet eye on the rest of her eating though.

It’s reassuring to hear others’ teens don’t do breakfast or lunch. I’m always worried mine will pass out in this heat. I do insist on an emergency snack in the bag but it’s never once been eaten in years of highschool. Dd has a meal as soon as she gets home then a sandwich later, maybe a snack. She’s never been into eating. Even as a tiny baby.

My ten year old rarely does breakfast. She’s just genuinely never hungry, even if on holiday or days off breakfast is not something she’s keen on. Her dads the same, never hungry first thing. I just leave it, she eats fine the rest of the day. I’m hit and miss breakfast wise for sure, so I figure she will ok.

I remember being the same at that age. I often felt a little sickly in the mornings if I ate breakfast. Was probably teenage hormones, looking back. Pack her a cereal bar in her bag, just in case. Then leave it.