Nearly 13 year old so slow in the morning

[irishmumto4]

Anyone have any good advice for getting their kids to move a little quicker in the morning? My oldest is about to turn 13 and he is sooo slow at getting ready in the morning. He goes straight to the bathroom and locks the door taking easily 10 minutes to brush his teeth and use the toilet.. then it's another 10 minutes getting dressed.. when he does make an appearance he is uncommunicative and moody. Last one to the car, never says goodbye etc.. He's a great boy the rest of the time and once he gets home from school is in great form and I have no other issues. Is this something I just have to grit my teeth and ignore?

As long as he is on time for the car, ignore.

He's probably going through puberty OP. This (IME) is entirely normal. Teenagers, particularly ones going through puberty, find it really hard to fall asleep at night, hard to get up in the morning, hard to feel awake and lively - I remember it myself as a teen - I felt I was struggling with brain fog and it's hormonal. They literally can't help it. Just pick your battles and as long as he's up and going to school on time, let it go. He'll come out the other side at some point ....

Is he on his phone?
I don't give them their phones until we're about to leave.
My 10yo especially, is a nightmare for getting distracted with things. When he goes up to get dressed I set a timer on his alexa for 10 minutes. More than enough time to get dressed!
I set timers for pretty much everything otherwise they will dilly dally about and we'll be late, eating breakfast 15 minutes. Brushing teeth etc. If they're done and ready before I am then they can have their phones and wait for me.

@AmberGer

Is he on his phone? I don't give them their phones until we're about to leave. My 10yo especially, is a nightmare for getting distracted with things. When he goes up to get dressed I set a timer on his alexa for 10 minutes. More than enough time to get dressed! I set timers for pretty much everything otherwise they will dilly dally about and we'll be late, eating breakfast 15 minutes. Brushing teeth etc. If they're done and ready before I am then they can have their phones and wait for me.

Yes I think he is on it to be honest.. I take it from him at bedtime but he goes and gets it in the morning. Maybe it'll be kept from him until he's fully ready and in the car!

Is he actually late to the car (not clear from your post)?

If he's not then just leave him to it.

If he is, I'd be quite tempted to drive away if he's not ready on time and let him find his own way to school.

Do you borrow my DS in the morning? Same age, exactly the same. The phone has to be off until he's fed, dressed and in shoes. If I hear it, it goes to work with me. Try more sleep or a club if you can afford it (mine does a martial art). I've found limiting screens after our evening meal helps as well. Play dominoes with him, or cards or something, just get him to engage with other family members away from screens for a nit and he seems to sleep better and be marginally less grumpy.

@zafferana

He's probably going through puberty OP. This (IME) is entirely normal. Teenagers, particularly ones going through puberty, find it really hard to fall asleep at night, hard to get up in the morning, hard to feel awake and lively - I remember it myself as a teen - I felt I was struggling with brain fog and it's hormonal. They literally can't help it. Just pick your battles and as long as he's up and going to school on time, let it go. He'll come out the other side at some point ....

Yes, I was the same as a teenager, from about 13 - 16 I was moody and slow in the mornings, couldn't help it, whether I got enough sleep or not. If he's on his phone maybe don't take at at first, just remind him that he can use it in the car, obviously do what you need to if he's not listening to that advice.

Exactly the same like my ds. Just before and during puberty especially boys need a lot of sleep. So everything is totally normal with your son.

All of my kids are like this, eldest is 14 and will happily spend 40 mins in the bathroom then 20 minutes getting ready, and my daughters take forever to eat their breakfast and then get dressed, I've come to the conclusion they're trying to give me some kind of breakdown 🤦‍♀️ so phones etc banned in morning here and they're still the same 🤷‍♀️

It's called consequences. He either does as he's told or he faces them, and he won't like them one bit.

Don't give him phone until he's ready. Otherwise ignore. Most teenagers aren't morning people.