Asd??

[ZooKeeper123]

I’m after some help as I feel like I’m going round and round in circles in my head... and Googling like mad...

My 10 year old daughter is...

-Fairly bright (higher end of middle groups)
-Loves to be around people
-Has sensitivities to clothes
Has to turn her clothes inside out a few times before putting anything on to check for spiders
-Won’t sit on our sofa (at all, for YEARS) because she’s convinced her sister leaves bogies on it
-Often doesn’t understand jokes, has to ask why we’re laughing and why it’s funny

• doesn’t really “get” people’s facial expressions...often thinks the worst if people are looking at her ...for example if she had a new coat and she saw someone lookin go she’d be convinced they hate it.

-has had suicidal thoughts -can be anxious

• pulls faces/picks her fingers when she’s feeling uncomfortable.
• still eats with her fingers unless constantly reminded
• petrified of getting “bugs” if anyone else around her feels ill

Reading the above.... would you say she is neuro typical?! I have suspicions she is autistic but don’t know if I’m barking up the wrong tree?!
She’s under cahms for anxiety. They haven’t mentioned autism but she’s definitely a masker if she does have anything.
If we go private it’s so much money and I still might be none the wiser 🤦🏼‍♀️

Thanks so much in advance,

Stressed out Mumma

I think from what you've said @ZooKeeper123 it's definitely worth investigating.

If your family income is less than £45k then you can get a free assessment with Caudwell Children within 3 months.

@PanicBuyingSprouts thank you so much. Unfortunately (but fortunately I guess 😅) we are just over that threshold. I have an initial assessment with a private place on the 4th over the phone. Then I guess I will see if they think it’s worth paying and taking it further x it’s difficult as I just can’t decide and although other people see some of the things she does...they don’t think it’s anything other than her being quirky

Have you approached camhs with your concerns with a view to getting her tested?
My dd was initially referred for a low mood and possible asd. It took them a while to assess, they exhausted other avenues first, she had her diagnosis about 18 months after referral.

I’d say she needs help with emotional regulation - Daniel Siegals books are brilliant.

As someone who is autistic and has ADHD it sounds like her main issue is anxiety.

Having ADHD means I suffer from emotional dysregulation. I’ve recently started ADHD meds and they’ve transformed my life - im now far less sensitive to sensory stimuli and my emotions are stable for the first time in my life. I also have more interest in socialising as I can pay attention to the conversation.

ADHD is still misunderstood and most people don’t understand that it. can cause challenges with socialising, being hypersensitive to sensory stimuli and emotional dysregulation. It could also be the cause of your child’s facial expressions/finger picking.

@HMG107 omg I actually want to hug you !!! I’ve just googled adhd in girls and she pretty much hits ALL of it!! Whereas with autism it was 50/50. THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart. I truly believe this is it. Should I go about getting her officially diagnosed do you think?! You don’t know how much this means to me...all I want to do is understand my little girl and I now feel like I can start to do that

Definitely get her formally diagnosed. She may need medication to get through secondary school. Read up lots (ADDitude mag online is great). Good luck!

This is great to hear. I was only diagnosed in my mid-thirties and it would have made a huge difference to my MH, as well as my career if I'd found out sooner.

I went to a private clinic in Liverpool but they only see adults. To give you an idea of price my assessment was under £360 and my first private prescription was £60 from Tesco- my NHS GP took over prescribing after this. I then had one follow up appointment 8 weeks later at £100 but the psychiatrist titrated my prescription in the meantime free of charge.

I know psychiatry-uk.com/ are often mentioned but I don't know any personally who has used them - psychiatry-uk.com/adhd/

I take the 14 hour slow release version of lisdexamfetamine.

Hi sounds familiar - investigating dd for asd and adhd. She is 9 and school highlighted to us re her behaviour.
It’s complicated as it has been going on a while. Thought she was ok but crying tonight saying her friend had told her everyone thought she was weird. This used to be a bf but she is maturing quickly and my dd is still q immature. Want to help her be more resilient!

@Lushmetender hugs being sent your way. It’s so tough isn’t it! Happy to chat on what’s app or something if you pm your number …we can support each other! My dd is currently being assessed for autism but they are also screening for adhd( willl need to go elsewhere to get that confirmed if it’s flagged) …we’ve had to go private… I just can’t wait 3 or 4 years down the line … I need to understand what she needs from me now :/

Does your daughter develop "obsessions" with pop stars, idols etc? Does she mimic friends behaviour, can see appear to be performing... ASD in girls is quite misunderstood and often coexist with ADHD. What you describe sounds rooted in anxiety, looking into ADHD accommodations might help.

@VioletLemon obsessions is a tricky one. She does, kind of. She’s pretty obsessed with bgt and when she finds someone on there she likes she has to show everyone ( won’t let you take your eyes off the screen /anyone talk in case you miss it) . Once she’s interested in a topic she makes her own little “fact book” …or writes stories. So when she was learning about ancient Egypt at school she became a little obsessed with the gods- kept telling everyone about them abs then did a fact book. Recently it’s been queen victorias coronation. She’s forced herself to like friends the tv show because all her friends do. So she watched it for a bit and didn’t understand it. But kept watching it until she started to enjoy it 🤦🏼‍♀️…I’m still not convinced she actually likes it though. Not sure she mimics behaviour but definitely uses language out of context so I think she copies language skills. Learns a new word but doesn’t really use it correctly if you get me. She misunderstands body language a fair bit. Just yesterday she had a singing lesson and came out in tears convinced the lady was “laughing her head off at me” ….not sure if any of that sounds asd. She filled in the initial questionnaires and I spoke to a lady and they said both those things did indicate it..hence going down the paying for private assessment route…