DS struggling with year 7 expections

[justanothermanicmonday21]

Is anyone else's DS struggling? I've given him the benefit of the doubt for the first term however he hasn't really settled in that well. Had two detentions now for missed homework and just feel like he's floundering a bit with having so much responsibility.

He also is type 1 diabetic so on top of a new school etc he's had to take on with the testing etc of himself which he isn't doing, I've taken a stern approach this term with missed testing means he misses out on technology. I've been really open and relaxed about him going out with friends to the local park, back with them after school or to ours and also dropping him to goals etc to spend the half day with friends on insets. Trying to be firm but fair. He can be quite manipulative, I know it's a huge adjustment and the diabetes add that extra stress for him but I want him to buck his ideas up. He said he is feeling overwhelmed and I'm not sure how to help him.

We sat down last night so I could help him get on top of homework, it literally took us from after school to dinner to do one piece of DT homework!! He has another due for tomorrow and football training tonight so that will be a juggle.

Me and his dad have split so weekends are difficult sometimes to get work done as he is at his dads every other weekend with no computer.

I am trying to save to get him a laptop but this won't be for a few more months with Xmas coming up.

Some thoughts:

• it's good that you are giving him freedom.
• when DD1 started yr7 we spent both days of every weekend doing her homework b/c she had activities every evening during the week and, in general, was too tired after school each day. It was intense.
• at that age, even the best youngsters can need for you to micromanage them. (I say this as a long time KS 3 teacher)

My DD is overwhelmed too without the Diabetes, although she has dyspraxia and executive function difficulties. I have taken on almost all the organisation and planning for her although she does it with me. We have a big white board with her timetable and things she needs each day on it and a folder for her books and do it together each evening. I also go through the homework app each day with her looking as what needs doing by when and helping her schedule it round her activities most effectively. There is no way she could do it on her own. Its been a massive change and the homework expectation is huge. She is also exhausted and I think it is very easy to underestimate the physical and mental toll of moving round the school all-day to different places, carrying 4 tonne of books and kit and also trying to negotiate the new social landscape which is pretty overwhelming by itself.

Thanks for your replies ladies! I like the idea of a timetable, he pretty good at remembering his things though so I don't think it's not remembering homework because I generally check the app too and ask him, just it's more unless I sit down with him he won't motivate himself to do it no matter how many times during the evening I remind him.

He's one of those children that nothing is ever his fault and he has excuses for everything which I'm trying to get him out of! I thought a couple of detentions might ground him and shock him a bit into being more proactive but he's gone on to have a couple more so I literally am managing him day by day! It's exhausting for me and I feel like I'm on at him a lot!! Xx