Preteen upper lip hair removal

[Mumtea]

Hi, my nearly 12 DD came to me last night asking for help to remove her upper lip hair. It’s not too much but become more noticeable of late and she has dark hair. I hadn’t realised she was bothered/had even noticed it before last night.
Can anyone advise what would be the best way to go about this? I originally thought bleach but maybe not on such young skin. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Would also prefer something we could do at home rather than having to take her somewhere on a regular basis.
Thanks

waxing absolutely does not make hair grow back thicker - this is a total myth. If anything, over time it damages the hair follicle and the hair becomes more fragile. This is why traction allopecia is a thing . . . . when you keep putting strain on hair and it comes out by the follicle it sometimes doesn't grow back.

we used oxy bleach as a compromise and it worked , now at 15 she may wax it if she wants but right now she is always behind amask so not bothered !

I've been fighting this one for decades! I've tried it all and am now settled on a combo of waxing and plucking. Wish I'd started with that originally, rather than itchy rashy hair removal cream and shaving, as I think it's had an impact on regrowth and some hairs seem to have stopped growing back altogether. The most successful thing I've tried though is ipl. It's on my wish list.

I'm definitely finding I'm getting more hair growth as I get older, especially since having children. But hadn't found that hair removal led to more regrowth prior to that. Well done for supporting your dc by the way, I was teased mercilessly and my mums support was really helpful.

My preteen dd uses throw little gadget and is very happy with it:
www.amazon.co.uk/LuVel-Painless-Electric-Technology-Flawless/dp/B07GJK7S71/ref=mp_s_a_1_17?dchild=1&keywords=upper+lip+hair+remover&sprefix=upper+lip&tag=mumsnetforu03-21&qid=1614850875&sr=8-17

Thank you all so much. I ordered some jolen mild bleach from Amazon. It’s mainly just at the sides it’s darker and there isn’t much hair so thought that might make the difference for her. Decided we could give it a go and if she’s not happy with that then we can try waxing.
@NotOnMute that looks like it has good reviews. How long do results last? I’m trying not to start something that’s difficult to upkeep.
Appreciate all the advice.

@Mumtea She uses it every few months, but that’s partly regrowth and partly whether she notices It’s literally 30 seconds, it’s next to her toothbrush so she just picks it up and does it when she feels like it.

That sounds ideal! Thank you @NotOnMute

I am dark and started getting rid of mine at a similar age. Bleach works in winter, but if you use it in summer if also removes your tan in that area, which looks ridiculous! If you DD has non-tanning skin that wouldn't matter I guess.
After the bleach debacle I moved onto Veet face wax strips, but I'm sure any brand would work. They are pretty much painless and you only need two double strips each time you do it so pretty cheap.
After twenty years of waxing them they've almost all given up and stopped growing

By pretty much painless, I should maybe clarify that I mean 'pretty much painless after you get used to it'!! The hairs aren't that deep there though, so nowhere near as bad as some other areas.

I’ve been wondering what to do with my pre teen - she is very hairy. I’ve got a friend whose mum took her for laser removal of her moustache as an early teen. I was horrified when she told me this (when we met in our 20s) as it seemed a violation of all my feminist principles, but actually my life would have been vastly improved by not having a moustache... I’m definitely considering it for DD.

Hair removal cream, shave with a small face razor, or best of all laser. Bleach will lighten but if there's a lot of hair there it may be just as visible. If she has dark hair and pale skin consider investing in a Lumea, I love mine.

The fact that women will spend so much time and money on facial hair removal, when shaving is so quick, easy, and the most effective method, just shows the sexism in the beauty industry.
Men even get tax free razors!

Shaving does not cause wild regrowth.

She tans very easily and has dark hair. Hadn’t really thought about bleaching skin too
My main gripe about shaving would be having to do it so often. I’m just looking for something low maintenance she can do as starting so early. Lots of good suggestions here though.

For now I would suggest veet facial hair wax strips. At least it will be quick and the redness should settle overnight if you do it before bed. Regrowth will look finer than with a hair removal cream/shaving as the hair won’t be blunt, and will reduce regrowth over time. When she is older, suggest she either invests in a Phillips lumea (or similar) or pays for laser hair removal - small areas so relatively inexpensive for a few sessions.

I started removal at similar age, after nasty comments at school, using sensitive hair removal cream. Needs patch testing and careful timing to avoid burns. Have used ever since, works fine.

Cream is low maintenance, cheap, painless etc.

@FeminismIsForFemales

It's very true that it grows bank thicker once you start. I recommend first making sure your daughter knows that she doesn't have to do this, and that beauty standards for women are very sexist. Make sure she knows it's a choice and she shouldn't be bullied by boys or friends into ever changing her body.

If you decide to do it, I recommend professional laser removal. It only takes a few sessions and is SO much better than shaving/bleaching/waxing which require a ton of maintenance. I had some hair lasered off and it's been amazing. Wish I'd done it years earlier.

Hair does not grow back thicker if you wax or shave. That's a common myth.

OP, I think at 12 she is a little too young to worry about hair removal, but I don't have an answer to your question. I hope either she becomes comfortable with it, or you find a method that works best for her.

I shave once a week. It takes < 5 seconds. No skin bleaching, chemical burns. I mean, it is literally the best option, but women have such a horror of it! Why??

I don't shave my face because I'm hairy all over my face, not just upper lip, so that's why I get the whole thing threaded. I also have eczema which is exacerbated by shaving and I usually use other hair removal options for all my other hair removal too, the only time I shave with a razor is my legs sometimes in summer and I pay for it with eczema.

Honestly I still really recommend the JML Flawless. Painless, cheap, quick and easy. I've been waxed before, it wasn't too bad but I imagine I would have found it harder going at your DD's age.

My granddaughter started early and went between threading and waxing. When she’s old enough she’ll have laser treatment wherever she wants it. My daughters and most of the women in the family have done it and have no regrets.

I bought a pack of 20 facial shavers from amazon for about 3 pound they do the job nicely!

I use a tweezy...pulls the hairs out at the root.
I find it oddly therapeutic but might be a bit sure initially!

https://www.tweezy.co.uk/products/tweezy-the-flagship

SORE not sure!!

My daughter is 13 and i wax hers. We both are very dark haired so its noticeable.
I buy the superdrug own facial wax strips. Just dont let her shower for 24 hours else you get spots.
My mum always made me bleach it when i was younger but it didnt lift properly so had a ginger tache 🙈