12 yo dd is on the bullying register...

[Helenj1977]

I'm absolutely fuming. I have not raised my girls to be bullied.

She's in a new group of friends who seem to be trouble.

What do I do?? I never thought I'd have to deal with this.

We're moving house imminently and she's due to have the nicest room. Do I upgrade her younger sister to that room as punishment??

It sounds like your DD might be in a situation where she has a toxic group of friends, the group are unpleasant and bully other students, including those who are clinging to the coattails of the bullies.

I've seen some situations where a victim on bullying tries to befriend the bullies as a way to hoping not to be bullied. They are a classic bystander and don't challenge the bullying of others because membership of the group is a better position than the receiving end of the worst nastiness.

Obviously I'm not saying this definitely is the case, but I can think of several occasions where this has happened with toxic groups.

Obviously, the situation I outlined doesn't excuse anything nasty your daughter has said or done to others. I was just explaining how someone can be bullied and a member of a bullying group.

This is quite confusing.
It's also possible that your daughter is both a bully and being bullied.
Your daughter is 12, so it's possible she doesn't fully understand the impact that her words/actions have, even if it's just "egging on" or standing silently by.