Help DS11 and play date

[Twinkie84]

Hi,

My DS11 has just started year 7. He decided to go to a secondary school with no one from his class so needed to start again on making friends (which he has). At primary I was always working later so DS would always go to after school club (this meant not many play dates could happen - there were a few but only in holidays when I had a free day to have someone over).

Since lockdown; I have now been working from home. So now he has made some nice friends that he would like to invite back after school and as I'm at home; this has become easier to do.

Now my question; what do 11 years do on 'play dates'? DS has a Xbox; do I leave him to entertain his friends? Or do I instigate any games etc.

Bit out of touch so any help will be good (please be nice)

When i was 11 (I'm in college! So not too long ago!), we played minecraft/other console games and the most our parents did was make us lunch/dinner (chicken nuggets or ham sandwiches! Nothing too extravagant). Definitely do not organise any 'activities' for them! It will humiliate him. You sound lovely by the way

X box will be a winner. Leave them to it, instigating games for 11 year olds would be "totally cringe"! 😁

Yeah I’d just leave them to it at that age. Your role is to provide drinks and snacks!

(Caveat: my rather quirky son and his best friend who has ASD need much more guidance/active intervention than my other kids at the same age. So it’s a bit dependent on the particular kids)

You won't see them all evening, except for sustenance and watering!!

Thank you everyone. I'll leave them to enjoy themselves

I am grinning (in a kind way!) at the thought of organising activities for 11 year olds
Just stock the snack cupboard, offer them a drink and leave them to it.
Maybe have a chat with Ds before hand if he’s not used to having people over-remind him that he can offer and fetch his friend a drink or a snack and let them know where the loo is.

@Whatatoodoodle

I am grinning (in a kind way!) at the thought of organising activities for 11 year olds Just stock the snack cupboard, offer them a drink and leave them to it. Maybe have a chat with Ds before hand if he’s not used to having people over-remind him that he can offer and fetch his friend a drink or a snack and let them know where the loo is.

Good shout - thank you I'll remind him as he gets a bit lost in the moment at times

You sound lovely! My 10 year old takes his friends to his room and they do LEGO or PlayStation. Come down for lunch or play handball or basketball in the drive way.
Not relevant so much at the moment but we do do outings rather than organised activities, eg. take them to the skate park.

The only thing I would say is at only 11 make sure the games are suitable - one of mine once went to.someone's who played much older-rated games and was therefore 'too busy' to ever go again.

My DS is 12, his friends are always in and out, or him in and out of their houses.
I let them play on the PS4 in his room, usually send up a plate of food and some squash. But not play dates a such.
They are usually out at the park or pools (we live abroad) and just pop in to break the time up.
After an hour or 2 I send them all back out in the fresh air again, or sometimes before if they start shouting at the PlayStation!

All went well! Stayed in his DS room for awhile on phones etc! They decided on takeaway pizza they had a great time playing on Xbox after