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My preteen son
4

kateshair · 12/09/2020 23:32

I’m a single mum to a 12 year old boy. Am worried as although he sees his father weekly for an over night stay it seems all that he does whilst he is there is play on his xbox. All fine as of course he plays on it whilst he is here at home with me however this is his only contact with his dad. Im concerned he’s not having a solid father/son relationship. He’s not learning how to become a man. Both his granddads are deceased, I have a brother but hes not close with my son.
I do have a partner but we don’t live together he comes round some evenings when son is upstairs.
I Make sure I meet up as much as possible with friends with sons, encourage son to do activities but feel sadly he is missing his vital male role model am looking for ways to minimise the damage this may do. My dad left when I was five so I know just how this lack of parental involvement can be damaging. Just looking for advice

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Iminaglasscaseofemotion · 12/09/2020 23:43

What do you think a male can teach him that you can't?

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kateshair · 13/09/2020 12:47

Many, many things really how to be a man for one l...

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iswhois · 13/09/2020 12:56

What would you prefer he do?

Do you mean typical "man" activities like sports, or do you mean you would prefer they spend more one on one time together?

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tostaky · 22/09/2020 05:31

what about a sports coach? Theres a saying that goes: up until 6: all about Mum, between 6 and 12 : all for dad and after 12, they need an external role model.
Look up Steve biddulph, his book about raising boys is fantastic.
(i have three of them!)

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