My feed

to access all these features

Parenting a preteen can be a minefield. Find support here.


Dd calling all the shots.

6 replies

malificent7 · 21/07/2020 15:42

Dps mum died( not dds gran.) Dd was upset that we would have to go to help dp as she " would miss her friends,"
She loves her group of friends but she pines for them when she is apart. She has missed them this lockdown but seen a few.
I am now with dp...duneral not for another 2 weeks. Dd wants to go back home for a week and see friends.
I don't mind and neither does dp but id rather stay with him and help him sort the house. Dds step sister is hete but no othet kids.
I just feel so resentful that i will have to leave dp for a week so dd can see her friends. She is 12 and shouldn't call the shots. I also feel torn. I want dd to have a bit of a a summer. If i go home for a week, dp will be fine and we will go back to see him a week before the funeral. I will have to suck it up wont i? Her mental health is important buf my mental health is shit as i feel that i am always compromising what i want to do for dds "friends". I feel like i am a walking cash machine, chef and taxi for her.

OP posts:
malificent7 · 21/07/2020 15:42


OP posts:
NightOwl19 · 21/07/2020 15:47

Tbh I wouldn't go, it's one week and there's a good reason your with your DP and supporting him. She can cope for an extra week.

lufcaregoingup · 21/07/2020 15:49

How far is home? Does she have any family or friends she could stay with for a week or so?

moveandmove · 21/07/2020 15:51

I would be saying no to dd.

3rdNamechange · 21/07/2020 17:48

Is her Dad around ? Could she stay with him ?
If not , stick to what you want to do , sometimes we can't always do what we want. Someone close to her has lost someone , we should be helpful and kind. I know she's young , but old enough to understand the situation.

DomDoesWotHeWants · 21/07/2020 17:54

She'll only call the shots if you let her.


Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.