Monthly cycle BEFORE periods ?????

[skybluedaze]

My 9 year old DD is growing up fast and I think periods may start soon...although they haven't yet. But her emotions seem to go haywire ( massive rages etc ) on an almost monthly cycle...3 weeks or so relatively normal and then chaos for a few days. Am I imagining this or is it a thing ? Thanks for any thoughts !

My DD was the same, it's almost as if their body is gearing up and practicing for the real thing.

Hope she's ok, it sounds like it could be pretty soon

Thanks so much - that's really helpful. She's always been very emotional but there really does seem to be a pattern now to when she's most likely to kick off. If it's hormone driven then I guess there's not that much she can do about it. I try to be understanding but when she loses it ( almost always over nothing...missing cardigans, who got a bigger slice of cake ..).she totally loses it and often ends up whacking her younger sister. Not okay..She was having some counselling at school.and can list off anger management strategies ( we even bought her a chill-out teepee! ) but in that moment of fury she just lashes out and doesn't care about the consequences. She is lovely most of the time but the rages seem.to blow up out of nowhere and do seem concentrated over a few days. Any more advice mumsnetters ?

A Mighty Girl has some book suggestions here and you might find Untangled useful yourself, it was recommended to me

That happened to me as a child too. Periods started soon after when I was 11. Poor thing, it's so young to be dealing with this.

That happened to me as a child too. Periods started soon after when I was 11. Poor thing, it's so young to be dealing with this.

It is isn't it. Just just feel so sorry for them. Our usual home living DD tried to leave home twice leading up to her periods starting,

@JiltedJohnsJulie it's such a shame. I have always had incredibly painful periods and I remember sitting howling during one of the first ones I ever had asking my mum why I had to deal with this when I didn't want a baby. Nature is so cruel to us.

Mine have always been really heavy and it looks as though DD is the same. Thankfully, she has period pants so the risk of leaking is less and I have the Mirena Coil which is unbelievably good

I've noticed this with 11 year old DD and it syncs with my cycle.

I'm post-menopausal ( complicated situation, but menopause plus toddlers equals absolutely no fun at all by the way..) so at least I know she's not syncing with me ! Thanks for all the great comments - I will try and be more sympathetic !

The raging I could deal with, it's the 'lashing out' that's the problem. But yes I do feel sorry to see her being buffeted about my hormonal storms at such a young age. Glad I'm not imagining the whole monthly cycle thing...I guess it's logical that hormones would come in waves as that's what will happen when her periods do actually start

Aaagh, typed that too quickly. Should say buffeted about BY hormonal storms, not MY hormonal storms...my hormones have given up, barely a ripple !

Menopausal and toddlers. You must be superhuman to have survived that

I used to have shocking pmt, changes to my diet helped. So no E numbers, carbs every 3 ours (oat cakes worked well for this), healthier eating generally, but especially the week before my period. I know my dd will suffer as she seems to have mood crashes and sugar cravings already... so I will be working on this for her (she’s 10)

Thanks that's really helpful. Her diet is not great so I will look at that. She just seems to be hungry constantly and gets very upset if she can't have large portions of meals and snacks frequently - I try and space stuff out and give healthier choices - we don't have fizzy drinks or juice or biscuits at home at all - but she still wants huge bowls of cereal, pasta etc. I feel like her emotions crash around partly because of those food choices, but I don't want to give her hang-ups about food and weight either.

The book “no more pms” by Maryon Stewart really helped me at the time, it might be a bit too detailed for now, but you can probably gleam some wisdom from it.

My dd is a sugar/white carb monster, she just doesn’t fancy the other stuff! It’s tough, and I know it’s going to get tougher!