Should i worry about 12 year old eating habits?

[Cushellekoala]

Name changed for this hoping not too outing.
My 12 year old is unbelievably fussy and has always been difficult with eating since i first weaned her. She very rarely finishes a meal and new things i give her in a tiny cereal bowl and she will only try a few mouthfuls. She often wants snacks, and is always asking for chocolate.
The other day i was helping her clean out her bedroom and i found some sweets from halloween and some chocolate muffins that she had bought from school, in a cupboard. When we were out shopping on saturday she asked for a small chocolate bar and i said ok, but then she got another one and was trying to hide it from me.
I am worried about her being secretive about eating and hiding food.
So as not to drip feed both myself and a close relative have both in the past had severe anorexia. I nearly died from it when i was 18 and spent 6 months in psychiatric hospital. The other relative was anorexic for about 15 years and had several lots of hospital treatment.
Its one of my biggest fears for dd, and Dh has worried about it too.
I am recovered and have been since before she was born so have tried really hard not to pass on any negativity around food and body shape.

Any feedback please?? Am i overreacting?

I have 2 DD's (11 & 14) the 14 year old will only eat enough dinner to 'earn' dessert, whereas the 11 year old loves savoury so will demolish her dinner and would rather have seconds than dessert.

Is her weight ok? I know it's difficult to weigh a child of that age, but does she look healthy?

I suffered with (not officially diagnosed) anorexia from age 16 - 19 and it's very hard not to pass on those issues to your children.

Thank you for your reply. I have a younger Dc who doesnt seem to have any issues with food.
DD has put on weight in the last year but i think that is down to puberty and she has also grown taller.
Its hard as i dont want to make a thing of it if it is nothing to worry about but similarly want to address any potential issues or behaviours before they become ingrained. I feel sad for the fun teenage/early 20s years i missed out on because i was so unhappy and preoccupied with food and exercise. (Shes not at all bothered about exercise!!)

I was and still am a fussy eater. I didn't like main meals much at all - not a huge meat fan and I have an incredibly sweet tooth - you could always find hidden sweet snacks in my room. I've never had an eating disorder, so this could be quite typical pre teen behaviour. That said given history it may be worth reading into anything which is helpful in prevent this route as a precaution

Hi, my son (nearly 12) is hugely fussy too. It used to stress me out and I felt such a failure producing meals he wouldn’t even try. Then I sat down, made a list of all the things he will eat (plain chicken, pizza, plain pasta, plain rice, carrots, broccoli, sausages, fruit etc,) not a huge list but there was more than I thought. Then I told him I would give him a combination of these every day until he was ready for something new. He was always welcome to try something of mine or his dads. He eats lots, it’s just the same old thing day in day out. Tough when we go to other people’s houses, he will often just say he’s not hungry rather than face the embarrassment. But anyway, my point I think is to come to an agreement - maybe let your daughter have a snack box in her room that she’s in control of, but on condition she helps you menu plan and she agrees what she will eat with the family. Good luck 😊