Not enough sleep. Can’t find a solution

[parrotonmyshoulder]

DD (9, Y5) in particular is not getting enough sleep. DS (6) probably isn’t either, but his mood isn’t so obviously effected. It seems worse this half term holiday because they could get more sleep but won’t/ don’t because, I assume, they’re just used to not having much.

On a school day, we all have to wake up at 6am. This is non negotiable and can’t change, due to location and time of school and work. Well, DC could be pushed to 6.30 but they always wake at 6 when I do.

DS is asleep by 7.30. DD by 8-8.30. This holiday (we’re staying with relatives), they have been awake around 5. Bedtime has stayed similar because they never sleep in any later even if they go to bed late.

DS is waking his sister I think. There is a further problem at home because DD is currently not sleeping in her own room due to being scared. This is a different (although somewhat related) issue that we’re working on. She is highly anxious anyway.

I can’t see any solutions here.

Why can't you make DD's bedtime earlier? My DC3 is 9yo and he also goes to sleep at 8-8.30, but he gets an extra hour in the morning compared to yours.

Were they ever good sleepers?

Thanks. She goes to bed 7-7.30 but doesn’t sleep straight away. She reads for a while.

They’ve never been good sleepers, no. Always early risers as babies and toddlers - long before the morning routine became as it is.

DS 7 has ADHD and sleeps from 7 until 5, DD 11 sleeps from 8.25 until 7 every school day except Monday when she has a booster and sleeps from 7.25 until 6.10, in the holidays she sleeps from about 10 until about 8.30.

Maybe they'll be better when they're back home. Do they seem tired when they're sleeping until 6am?

Tell them to rest in bed til 6.30 for a start.

That seems a reasonable amount of sleep for children that age. Do they wake up in the night

They’re not tired in the mornings. But I’m sure it contributes to grumpiness later in the day - mine if not theirs!

Thanks.

My 9&7 year old are asleep by 8.30, awake at 7-7.30.

They were shit sleepers as young ones and better now.

When I was at work they had to get up at 6.30 and would need a much earlier bedtime.

When they shared a room, my youngest would wake my eldest up (he needs more sleep than she does!) so we split them into their separate rooms. My eldest didn’t like it at first as he was scared alone but after some effort, he’s fine now.

Maybe they’re grumpy because we all get grumpy mid afternoon/evening time? Well we do anyway because the days can be long with kids!

They might go to sleep earlier now they’ve been waking at 5am so when you get home, try an hour earlier bedtime. Mine will only really settle quickly after a decent bit of exercise in the day.

Thanks, Iggly. Were you around on baby sleep threads approximately 9 and 6 years ago by any chance?

They do go to sleep well at night. DD needs to read a bit first and has new fears (due to being scared by something at school) so this affects falling to sleep sometimes, but not the early waking. She moves to her brother’s room (they shared until recently) if she doesn’t drop off to sleep quickly, and then can sleep all night.

Lots of exercise and general business to make them tired. Not always enough calming and relaxing time though. Long school days - out of the house 7- 6

Thanks, Iggly. Were you around on baby sleep threads approximately 9 and 6 years ago by any chance

Oh yes I was!!! After the recent mumsnet hacking problem, my name change reverted back to Iggly so I decided to stay with it. Were you there too under a different name?

Dcs are so much better now, I couldn’t go back to those dark days. They do mess around a bit at bedtime but they sleep longer in the mornings so I live with it. It’s funny that my eldest needs and cherishes his sleep and will tell his sister off if she messes about and keeps him up (hence separating them again).

Yes, I’ve had several name changes too. Terrible babies but lots of support back then on sleep and breastfeeding threads.

Last night was good. I did some creative bribery and bed swapping and they slept reasonably well.