Child's friend using inappropriate texts

[Aaina]

Hi everyone, my daughter is 11 and just started secondary school. one of her best friends (have been friends since class 2) chose another secondary school. they still meet up sometimes on weekends and text through WhatsApp, usually in a group of a few more friends. I check messages now and then and I see that this girl is using swear words/ inappropriate language very often, and keeps sharing memes, videos and pictures of overly sexual themes. I have talked to my daughter about it. She said she would tell her friend to stop but i am very frustrated....i really want to end all kind of communication but i know my daughter will be miserable since she is a good and old friend. what would you do?
And i also want to know how most parents feel about checking their children's messages or social media account activities?

I'd not only be checking her phone I'd be explaining why this isn't ok and how she can find better friends.

If it continued I think I'd also block her.

Could you encourage your DD to spend more time with her new friends instead?

I'd also be talking to the school/the parents about an o erly sexualised 11y/old. Sometimes it's kids showing off and trying to be "grown up" and sometimes, maybe, hopefully not, it's an indication that a child is being sexually abused. Sorry to.be the one to say that

Thanks for the advice guys....for now i have told my daughter and her friend clearly....one more post like that means I talk to her parents and no more contact. I will definitely be limiting the meetups in future.

If you know the parents well I’d just have a quick chat.

i'd text that girl and warn her to stop, or i'm forwarding those texts to her parents.

I'd strongly suggest you inform the school, it could be that she has learned this behavior from someone who is grooming her (I know of a similar case).

Age limit for WhatsApp went up to 16 a little while ago too.

My son was in the same position recently, he's 12 but in Year 7. Different school to his best mate from primary. Inappropriate language being used and sexual references. But it was MY SON that was doing it and the other mother screen shotted it to show me via messenger.

I was mortified, but genuinely pleased she had contacted me and it was stamped out straight away. My son was basically showing off with his new found "I'm at senior school now" type feelings. We had a good chat about it and I now check him phone regularly.