Am I being mean

[rach2713]

My son is 11 and has adhd. 2 weeks ago he was playing fortnite and got angry at the game and smashed his TV up. I am for ever telling him to stop shouting and to calm down but it got to much I guess. Me and his dad have said he won't get another TV until he saves up for one to learn that he can't go round smashing tvs up over a game. My dad has been pushing me to give him a TV as he says he has learned his lesson by now and says he can give him the old one back once he has saved for a new one but I just think he won't learn if we give in and give him a TV just now..

[pippistrelle]

I don't think you're being mean at all. But I say that from the point of view of not having had to take into account ADHD. Clearly, that must have an impact on his ability to rein things in but you'll have a feel for that. So, if you don't think your punishment was harsh, then no-one else has the right to. Ignore your dad.

[rach2713]

He has never done anything like this before and it's only when he plays fortnite his mood changes and has attitude. He has broken headsets and the cables for his controls but I can't justify letting him have a tv until he earns money for a new one as it being a bigger item. He still has his phone to watch YouTube and still has his ps4 but just can't play it with no tv ..

[ihatethecold]

I wouldn't get him another TV. Fortnite causes so many issues for parents so I would use the opportunity to keep him off of it.

He has a phone, Let him watch TV with you instead if he wants to view something on the telly.

[pippistrelle]

it's only when he plays fortnite his mood changes and has attitude

Then, the longer he's without a TV, the better it is for everyone.

[RitaFairclough]

My son is only 8 but he has ADHD too. His behaviour changed so dramatically when he played Fortnite that we deleted it. It means his older brother can’t play any more either but he understands.

I definitely wouldn’t just give him a new TV. And if you do replace it eventually I wouldn’t let him play Fortnite any more.

[rach2713]

I have given him jobs to do around the house to earn pocket money. I have said to him once he has saved up to get a TV he will be limited to playing it..

[NameChangeToAvoidBeingFound]

Then take away fortnite. I have ADHD, autism and other learning difficulties that make it hard to keep my cool. Which means its more important that I and he learns. Take away/monitor him while he's playing it (once he has earned a TV back) you'd be sending the wrong message just giving him one, and when you see his mood change, take away the game completely until he calms down. Then give it back. He'll learn soon enough to control himself.

[Happyandshiney]

I have an 11yo.

If he deliberately broke a TV playing a game then the game would be banned permanently and it would be a very, very long time until he was given the privilege of a TV.

This isn’t your Dad’s decision.