Fear of vomiting

[Bigbus]

I would be really grateful for some advice (or just to know that someone else is also going through this!). My 12yo eldest dd has always suffered from a fear of vomiting that has affected her in various ways. In yr6 things got much better and she was able to go away with her school overseas. Unfortunately during the holidays she was in the back of our car with a friend who vomited. Since then things have got much worse. She told me that she is anxious all the time and is constantly watching other people in case they might be sick. She won’t go on rollercoasters anymore and she is restricting what she will eat. She doesn’t want to go on school trips or eat at restaurants.

She has recently started secondary school and had been doing really well despite all this. She’s bright and she has made friends, joined clubs etc. However, today the boy she was sitting next to didn’t look very well so she asked him if he was ok and he said he felt sick. She got really upset and had to be looked after by a teacher and move desks. This was second period - she managed the rest of the day but she says she was very anxious. When she got home she was very upset and said she doesn’t want to go back to school. She’s apprehensive about an upcoming theatre trip which she has previously been really excited about. She’s panicking and in tears.

I feel like these two incidents have set her back so much and I’m sad for her.

We’ve been to the GP who has agreed to refer her and I’ll talk to the school on Monday (she has asked me to do this) Does anyone else have any experience with this?

Thank you

No experience sorry OP but just want to offer my sympathies. It must be awful watching her suffer like this. Do you think that doing an online CBT course might help her while you wait for the referral?

Thank you. It's so sad because she was doing so well. I wish we had never taken her friend on that trip!

Don’t beat yourself up about it. Keep taking to her OP and make sure she gets plenty of exercise. Bit of a cliche I know but it should help with anxiety. Have a look at [[http://www.brave-online.com this too]

Fellow sufferer here, no specific advice but just wanted to say you are a great mum for supporting her so well. I suffered with this phobia for years in my childhood, my mum didn't know about my fears so I kept all the anxiety to myself.

Fellow sufferer here too. She sounds exactly as I was at that age. You sound lovely, and really supportive. My mum was the same and it really helped. It’s great that you’ve already been to the GP.

I’m 33 now and still bloody terrified of being sick. Nowhere near like I was though - I seemed to grow out of the obsessive phase where it dictated what I would do or where I would go (by about the age of 16-17) but if I ever feel sick I get very panicky. However if I ever am sick, it is nowhere near as bad as I think.

On the plus side - I never got drunk as a teen, and have still never been so drunk I was sick, as I was always so worried about it.

Hoping she feels less anxious soon. Carry on doing what you are doing - just listen to her fears and reassure here where you can.

*her

I believe it’s called emetophobia. My 8yo has developed it in the last couple of months. I’d never have believed my usually sunny, confident girl could be caught in the grip of something so tricky.

And there’s the added fear, especially as she’s a girl, that it could really grip harder onto her psyche and lead to an eating disorder. I’m at my wit’s end, as she’s also started to make the connection that if she doesn’t eat, she can’t throw up. The school psych was of limited help, they seem to treat it like any other anxiety thing. It’s actually very specific in its symptoms and that has me worried.

Watching the thread with interest. We’re on school hols here (oz) but I’m keen to find a psychologist for my dd when school starts again, someone with experience with this. I’m a bit worried that getting her to talk about it too much will actually strengthen the phobia? We’ve had some success with distracting her and down-playing it, clocking up some positive experiences (like watching her newborn cousin spit up and not give a hoot) and I’d hate to mess with that.

I could have cried a few weeks ago when I finally got her to eat school lunches again, and her form teacher started teaching the class all about the digestive system. Really bad timing. Suddenly everyone in her year was pretend vomiting and telling all their family vomit stories. Set us back a lot, I tell you!

Good luck, I hope you find a solution.

Thank you all so much for the replies. Now I have started to tell people about it, it seems to be a lot more prevalent than I had realised.

Skittlesandbeer - I know what you mean about the food worries. My dd is a pescatarian and eggs were always a good option as she would eat them cooked any way. But because I had cooked some eggs that morning before we went out and her friend was sick, she won't eat eggs anymore. Also she won't eat noodles at home because she once had them and then felt nauseous. She is trying though and she did eat an omelette the other day. I don't want to make a big fuss about the food thing because I worry that it will become a huge issue and lead to more anxiety around food so I am trying to keep it low key and be led by her but it's really hard - especially when it is something she has eaten before. She has managed to start having school dinners now so that is progress. I spoke to a friend of mine at the weekend and he told me that he used to have this phobia and he had some counselling and it really helped so I think we'll definitely go for that - the GP is referring her.

Skipperskipper - it's good to hear that the more extreme anxiety did wear off a bit as you got older. I have bought a book called 'My Anxiety Handbook - Getting back on Track' which is for 12-18 year olds and it also mentions that most children grow out of the intense anxiety as they get towards adulthood. I am going to read the book before I give it to DD. It's hard to get the balance between being available to talk and not being too overbearing or making it an even bigger issue.

Dancergirl - thank you. If there are any positives to this I will say that she is talking to me and telling me a lot about how she is feeling and our relationship is good. I guess she's not actually a teenager yet so I still have the silent and sullen years to come!

JiltedJohnsJulie - thank you, I will definitely look at the website and look into online CBT. I think she would really engage with that. Great idea, thanks!

Not looking forward to tomorrow morning, getting her to school! She always goes by herself but tomorrow she said I can walk with her and then I'll try and see if she can move tables in the lesson in question - she says she thinks she'll be ok if that can be done.

Thanks again everyone, it really helps to hear from you all.