Seeking advice on son's current behaviour please

[Outofmycomfortzone]

Hi there. I've never reached out like this before and I'm anxious but I'm also determined to make some much needed positive changes before another year disappears behind me (Sept already...WTH ?) But I need some help, maybe a little advice and I've no one that I can turn to for support, that's not to say I don't have friends, but the latter is true. And I've rocked the single mother life, my son is a good kid and I'm proud of him but this year has just seemed to be one long war against his addiction to the PS4 and me trying to get him to do anything else, I used to be able to keep a balanced, more active lifestyle with him but somewhere, somehow I just seemed to loose that in the juggle of trying to work, make ends meet, get qualifications, raise a child, and battle my own mental health - which is daily and exhausting. It is what it is, it's not sympathy I'm here for but to maybe get some ideas.and support because I'm definitely feeling like I'm stuck in a rut, my work day ends at 6pm then I go home to cook, clean, catch up on a never ending list of jobs till I fall into bed near midnight. My day off will usually mean housework, shopping, any d.i.y or decorating etc etc weekends have frankly deteriorated into more arguing punctuated by reasonable and practical talks on how to have less PS4 time and effort is made till the following week sweeps by and by the time I've sat down and collected my thoughts I'm back to square one with my son and it's a vicious circle. And all the time I am aware of this nagging voice in my head because I know my son's attitude and behaviour is worsening and I do blame it on his gaming where I'm constantly and also positively and gently trying to make him see how being in a heightened state of stress is causing these changes in his attitude and behaviour and also his lack of exercise is really starting to worry me. And I do , I really do try to get him up and out and we go off on little roaming adventures over local parks and we enjoy swimming and cycling but it's just not often enough and I'm struggling to know how to get past this point. As Billbo Bagging wisely said... I feel stretched thin, like butter spread over too much bread...

What age is your son? Can't you take the PS4 off him?

for the ps4, we have a chart system. you allot 3 hours at the start of the week, and your son can choose when he uses these hours, however he likes. it will teach him to be more responsible too, because once the hours are gone they are gone and he doesn't get any more. keep a chart so you can keep track of how many hours he uses. for the other stuff, have you got a slow cooker? they go for really cheap prices on ebay second hand, and you can just stick the ingredients in there and let it do its thing, meaning you can get on with other stuff. you could try allotting one hour at the weekend for swimming, and try to keep to that, meaning you and your son get a break from the house. all the best, you sound like you are doing a fab job x

Take it off of him..........

I’m a bit late replying to this but just to say, that I think many families share your pain especially when fortnite is involved.
I found telling my son to finish and come off the the PS4/ Xbox would start Ww3. However, I learned that you can turn off the WiFi to individual devices through your WiFi provider. This meant I could tell him in advance that his gaming would finish at 9 pm and it automatically turns itself off. Unbelievably he accepted this. You can preset it so maybe only an hour an evening and more at the weekend or school holidays.Good luck, the fact that you want help and are trying your best, days you are being an amazing mum xx