Banned from watching love island

[Icantfindausername]

My daughter was 12 a few weeks ago. She asked if I could watch love island and I told her no because I didn't think it was appropriate for a 12 year old, she had a whinge everyone else watching it etc etc. I said tough my rules and reasons for saying no. Anyway my husband has just caught her in bed watching it on her laptop on iplayer! We are furious. I've told her she will have consequences for this as she knows my rules. What do you think are reasonable punishments? I've considered taking her off snapchat as she loves that. But really don't know what to do. Please help x

[TallAndUnapologetic]

I've been spared this - DD (11) finishing primary this month - but I think taking away Snapchat might be a little disproportionate. Its one thing for her to feel left out of gossip about some ghastly reality show; quite another to temporarily sever a communication channel completely. (I also wonder how enforceable this would be unless you plan to confiscate her phone)

Google informs me the TV "show" (a very charitable description if you ask me) ends Monday 30 July, so possibly restrict evening laptop use for a spell? If she's persistent enough to work out some way of watching it on her phone (most preteens aren't in my experience), then consider something harsher.

[French2019]

I don't do punishments but I do think natural consequences are ok. She is demonstrated that she can't be trusted to use her laptop without supervision, so I'd be saying that she can only use it downstairs while you're able to supervise her - for an indefinite period until you're convinced that you can trust her again.

If she is likely to watch it on her phone, then you might have to put some restrictions on that too.

I'm very relaxed about what I allow dd to watch - I wouldn't ban love island but would definitely discourage it. In your situation, I would be more concerned about the breach of trust, and I'd make that really clear.

[NorthernSpirit]

Agree it’s totally inappropriate viewing for a 12 year old.

She shouldn’t be watching a laptop in bed (whatever she’s watching) so i’d take that away. No screens in bedrooms.

Snapchat - by law kids shouldn’t have this or any SM until 13 (so she’s lied about her age). How long until her 13th birthday bday? Can you take it away until then?

[ImAGoofyGoober]

The natural consequence would be that she can’t be trusted with a laptop so it’s now banned unless for supervised homework.

The show might finish soon but will be on catch up for the next couple of months.

[cloudtree]

Another who agrees with natural consequences. laptop and phone taken away for a period of time and permanent rule that no devices after 7.30pm. They stay downstairs charging.

[Icantfindausername]

Thanks all. I have removed her laptop and hidden it away. I've told she she can have it back soon but only have it when we are in the room. Thanks for your idea x

[TeenTimesTwo]

You may be able to set parental controls such that laptop only works between certain hours. That is what we have done for DD.

agree no tech in room at night though.

[TheB3sTMuuum]

just put locks on certain website like youtube let them use yt kids give them access to youtube when they are 21 its as bad as drink driving.

[Milan05]

Does the computer have Windows? Are you the administrator on the computer? Use Family Safety: you can block access to websites, put curfew and time limits, and the computer will request parental accord at installing programs and accessing some websites.