Feeling Lost.....

[BaconAndAvocado]

DS1 is away at Uni, DS2 is 11 and DD is 9 and I feel more and more like I'm needed less and less.

I work part-time so that I can pick up the DCs from school but as soon as we get in from the school run, they're off to their rooms, onto their iPads etc.

I know they need time to relax but I don't feel like we do anything together anymore.

Is this just the shape of things to come?

Yes which is why I started doing longer hours at work! My two who are 11 and 14 now get the bus home from school so I don't even need to do the school run any more. I still get home early enough from work to make us all dinner and we all catch up then. And I get the kids to surrender all screens by 8pm and they'll then often reappear so we will watch something on TV together. I like having the extra time to myself though especially when I've been at work all day.

That's interesting nong

Mine aren't quite in that age bracket yet. I guess I'm taking it all,a bit too personally!

I can understand how you feel OP, my two Ds’ are 16 & 14, rare to be in the same room, unless it’s dinner time!

I want them to be independent, of course, but it is hard to let go. But it is equally wonderful seeing their development into confident young people. I know I couldn’t be prouder of my sons.

You need to find something else for you, not just working more necessary, unless that’s what you want to do.

Is there is hobby that may interest you, that you may not have had time for in the past?

See more of friends?

yoga I think generally that I'm at a bit of an impasse. I'm 48, maybe going into the menopause and just don't feel as important anymore.

Deep down, I know I am ! My family are all very loving and do value me.....

I'm just recovering from the flu so I'm perhaps feeling more vulnerable than usual!

My DC are 8, 10 and 12. They are more independent now, but I still read with the younger two every night.

What about weekends? We often go out together - for lunch, or to a cafe for cake, or for a bike ride or something. On Saturday night we usually all watch TV together.

Amber yes, we still read at bedtime and do lots of stuff at the weekends.

Maybe I'm over thinking things!

Sounds fine to me, OP!