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DS 11 refuses to go to school/easily wound up/attachment issues

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gill9152 · 08/01/2018 08:19


My DS is 11, only child. I am single mom with health issues with no immediate support in terms of no one to ever babysit or give me time out. He had bad experience at primary school being bullied etc but has now struggled settling into high school. He gets wound up so easily and reacts and so is always being wound up and then he gets into trouble for reacting. Makes friends ok but isnt interested in doing anything at all outside of school. Did do scouts for a year but now stopped. He wants to be with me all the time which is lovely but can be quite claustrophobic for me. He doesnt even go up to his room much.

His Grandad (he is very close to) is quite poorly in hospital at moe, been in for 6 weeks yest when saw him he was bit worse so DS was up late worrying about him last night so is tired today and refused to go to school. We end up in screaming match with him begging for day off and me saying no tiredness isnt a reason to be off. Have comprimised in end and sent him back to bed saying once slept will get dressed go to school. He isnt happy about this but has no other choice or I will ring the school and say he refused, help!
In past he has feigned illness to get a day off just to be with me as he hates leaving me. Yet his time at school is only time i get for me and I care for my elderly parents as still caring for mom whilst dad in hosp too. Other time I have had to take him straight into a teacher coz he hasnt wanted to go in. I just feel so overwhelmed and emotionally drained. Any tips or advice would be so gratefully appreciated.
He is a good boy most of the time. Helped cook dinner yest and helps out loads.

Also I did have cancer (now in remission) when he was 3/4/5 which has affected his attachment issues.

Is anyone else in a similar situation?

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EveryoneTalkAboutPopMusic · 08/01/2018 22:03

I can understand how the Cancer has affected him and how his Grandad being ill is affecting him too. Have you talked through how he feels about his Grandad with him? It might be worth telling the school about your DF being ill too as it could very well be affecting his behaviour.

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