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DS pubic hair age 9 - is this normal, and what's next??

4 replies

LapinDeBois · 22/08/2017 22:17

DS1 showed me in the bath yesterday that he's got a couple of pubic hairs growing, and was a bit worried about what they were. Felt like a very bad mother for not making him better prepared, but I thought boys usually started later than this!! (FWIW I'm not resistant to telling him stuff, it's just that I've always gone for the 'answer all questions as fully and openly as possible' approach - but he's never asked any! - and when I've tried to start birds and bees type conversations he's never been very interested, so I haven't pushed it.) We had a good calm chat, and I've ordered an Usborne book for him, and plan to chat more with him when that arrives (I didn't want to wallop him with the whole lot in one go!).

Anyway, I feel v naive now, but was surprised that he seems to be starting puberty this early. Is this unusual? He is the tallest in his class, and I've noticed that he's bulked out slightly over the last year (though he's still pretty lanky) - but I'd just assumed that was general growth rather than actual puberty. It doesn't help that he's quite emotionally 'innocent' in a lot of ways (totally un-cool, no interest in being/acting any older than he is), so I think that's contributed to me being a bit taken by surprise.

Anyway, I would be interested to hear others' experiences. Do these first signs means other 'stuff' will happen quite rapidly, or could it take ages? Is there anything else I can do to help him other than tell him what to expect, reassure him that everything's normal, tell him he can always talk to me if he's anxious or confused about anything??

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TenThousandSpoons · 22/08/2017 22:24

Sounds like you have a good plan in place and have reassured him that all is ok. No experience but I've also taken the "answer all qns" route so my 8 year old dd knows everything about puberty/reproduction but my 6 year old ds has not really asked anything. Must tell him in next year or so even though he has no interest!

MrsJoyOdell · 22/08/2017 22:31

The usborne books are brilliant. I bought it for DS1 when he was about 8 as I started my periods at 10 and was/am concerned about a relatively early onset of puberty for my boys. DS2 is a year younger and they've both read it and giggled about how gross it is Grin

As it happens, DS2 is showing more signs of impending puberty than DS1, but I have no doubt the book helped a lot. I think they really benefit from having something to read alone, where they won't feel embarrassed and shut down. I made it clear they could ask me/DH any questions they had about it and they did.

Don't feel bad, 9 is still very young. DS2 is also 9, and hasn't been for long and it makes me a bit sad that it's starting already. He's getting the odd spot/blackhead and definitely has greasier skin. His hair is greasier too and needs much more frequent washing! He hates that, but only because he's lazy!

LapinDeBois · 22/08/2017 22:32

Yes, I've got a younger DS of 6, and he's much more likely to ask questions I think! Quite a lot of things I've told DS1 have come from things that DS2 has asked (so we've covered interesting topics like the death penalty and gay rights, but never got round to the details of puberty Grin).

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LapinDeBois · 22/08/2017 22:34

Thanks MrsJoy. I hope I've caught him in time that he won't be too embarrassed asking me questions. Glad you found the book so helpful, it looked really good on Amazon.

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