Swimming lessons. DS wants to stop, should I push him to continue?

[CurlsandCurves]

DS1 had swimming lessons and went right the way through the whole programme offered, swimming a mile and doing survival training.

DS2 has never been a fan. He's currently in stage 5 out of 7 (this doesn't include survival, they are after the 7 stages). He can swim, and has done his 25 metres, I spoke to his teacher and he's pretty close to getting his 50 in the next few weeks.

It's getting harder and harder to get him to go, he really doesn't enjoy it. Says he can swim, so why can't he just quit now. I guess I'm just after other opinions really. Do you think his level of swimming is adequate? DH is of the opinion that he needs to keep going which is easy for him to say, it's not him who has to drag him there! I don't know what to do for the best really...

I have MS (bear with me on this) but I love swimming. I wanted it to be a sport I could do with my dd. As soon as she started hating lessons, I stopped until she was ready again. I think that is more important that badges. Now she can and does enjoy swimming and I am glad we took a pause.

Maybe agree to stop after the 50 metres since he is almost there?

Forgot to say, there's also the financial thing. I have to pay for blocks of 10 lessons and he's only got about 2 left! But I think I'll just have to pay for the next 10 and see what happens.

flapjacks I was thinking of that. I think I'd feel happier knowing he can do a decent distance. I just want the peace of mind that he can swim competently and is safe in the water.

I'm a terrible swimmer, hated lessons and refused to go. However if your son can already swim, I'd probably tell him he can stop once the course has been completed. So he needs to realise the sooner he finishes the sooner he can stop going.

I've told DS1 100m front crawl, 100m back stroke, 100m breast stroke.
He is very nearly there. I'm rejecting his pleas on technical points rather than actually covering the distance on his back. ie his style is crap!

BUT, we live somewhere very hot. In the summer, the only relief is to jump into the pool, and the pool is 2m deep at both ends ie noone can stand in it. The pool is also open, and no life guard, so being able to swim reasonably is actually quite important.

Obviously I don't know your son, I can only speak for my own situation. Personally, I would be prepared to lose the money and stop the lessons until he is ready. In a bit, Take him yourself a few times and be patient with his attempts . When he is ready, start again.
They started a swimming course at school. I insisted my dd go in the weaker group and I took her myself on the weekends (her choice) to help build her confidence. She's no Rebecca Adlington but at least she enjoys it.
I was fearful of making my daughter resent swimming when I was so keen to enjoy it with her.

Radishal re taking a break and starting again, you've reminded me that they have lessons in yr5 at school anyway so if he does stop he'll get a 'top up' of lessons then which he has to do. So that makes me feel better about it.

I agree about setting an end point with him. My parents always said 100m- I have no idea why. I kept going and going, my brother got out of the pool after doing his 100m test and announced he was quitting.

Funny, my DS lost interest after gaining his 25m certificate. We let him have a break as his lessons just weren't productive anymore and we don't like the idea of forcing him unnecessarily - there's enough of that in his life (going to school!).

There are some things that I have kept non-negotiable for my kids - specific study groups (languages/music), scouts/guides and swimming lessons (theybswim, but the lessons are to make them stronger swimmers). So it's down to you really - if you think it will benefit them then yanbu to tell him he's got no option. If however you don't see any value in it then stop.

Obviously there is value in learning to be a strong swimmer. However, making that process a miserable experience for your child is counterproductive. A pause is a good idea.

Mine both hated swimming lessons. I made the deal that they could quit as soon as they passed their 100m. This gave them an end in sight and worked well. I paid for 121 lessons which speeded up the process no end. I also paid for the teacher to do a holiday pool safety session for them.

I let DS stop lessons after he got to 100m too (goodness knows why that's the magic number!). We do try now to go to the pool as a family to have fun, rather than structured swimming lessons, so he's keeping his skills up a bit and is safe in the water, which is obviously important.

I'm not sure why I picked 100m! They were around 8 at the time IIRC.
I never forced DC to do extra curricular activities but swimming was for safety. 25m doesn't sound much and I was aiming for them to be able to go in a pool together without an adult.
DS1 did a lifeguard qualification at 16.

Please let him stop if he wants to. As a child I was forced to continue flute lessons & Guides to the bitter end. I hated both & used to dread each Tuesday & Wednesday because of it.

This now clouds almost every memory of my childhood. If anyone asks "what do you remember from childhood?" all that immediately springs to mind is being forcibly made to go to flute lessons & Guides. Happy memories are pushed somewhere backwards (although there were plenty).

Incidentally, I loved swimming (still do) but wasn't allowed to have proper lessons as "you do that at school and we can't afford to do everything!"

Because of this my DCs only do the out of school activities they want to do for as long as they want to do them. For DS1 that was just a couple of years' karate. For DS2 it was every sport available! For DD currently it's just swimming & dance.

Obviously some things (such as school) are non-optional but I firmly believe the rest should be the child's own choice.

We agreed with ds he could stop when he could do 4 lengths non stop (100m). He hates lessons. Not everyone enjoys swimming. Ds does other activities now and is happier

Santa swimming is a bit different to other skills in that it could save your life, though.

I agree that 50m (even if it's the next block) is a good aim and if it's a concrete aim he can see if he puts in more effort he will get there quicker.

But OP's DS can already swim Drs. I'm not at all convinced that being able to swim almost 50m (as he can now) is less safe than pushing him to be able to swim the actual whole 50m.

Not if the thought of going to the lessons is making him miserable.

one of mine was crap and hated swimming so I let him stop at stage 7 after he did his mile. if they can swim a mile they are probably fairly safe strong swimmers.