My DD (11yrs) is extremely scared of dogs. She has not always been as my ex SIL had a dog that she adored and grew up around. She got to about 6 yrs old and literally overnight became scared. There have been no issues with dogs at all, in any shape or form, so we are at a loss as to how this came about.
I have tried reassurance, approaching dogs with her and friends have tried to help her but to no avail. She will literally walk in the road to avoid a dog on a lead; she won't even check the road is clear beforehand her fear is that bad, which naturally has me losing my rag but worrying about her at the same time!
I have tried saying if you run away from a dog, most of them will will run after her because it thinks it is a game. Told her standing still is best to let the dog sniff you (the very rare times I have managed to get her to stand still to prove a point, dogs have have jumped and she's freaked so now she just moves out of the way). She will only, on rare occasions, go near a dog if she sees that is old and placid and she is watching others stroke it. Or if it is a really tiny dog but even then she is unsure.
18 months ago I considered getting a dog, as it had been suggested it might help (only a small one). I put a deposit down and got caught up in it but realised I could not really afford it, I would be the one looking after it all the time (DD goes to XH every other weekend whilst I was spending that time with XP), it was a tie when it came to bookings holidays, plus she may still have been scared. Plus I did not want to get a dog, only to send it back, as would have been unfair on the poor dog.
She is of pretty strong character, not much scares her but dogs reduce her to a trembling wreck and I am at a loss of what to do. It has affected her being invited over to friends for sleepovers because of this. She is starting secondary in September and I have told her if she gets invited by new friends, and she keeps declining on the basis of purely a dog, she won't be asked anymore. Sounds harsh but older children are less forgiving than primary school children (well in my IME).
Any advice appreciate thanks you.