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Parenting a preteen can be a minefield. Find support here.


9 year olds attitude!

6 replies

Tillytoes14 · 19/04/2015 21:14

Hi, my son is 9 next month and his behaviour lately is rapidly going downhill. He has his kind and loving moments, but he also has his moments where he's full of negative attitude, he can be rude (says shut up and calls both me and his younger brother stupid) he has started to shout at the family including myself, he doesn't always use an appropriate tone of voice when asking for things, he accuses us of doing things on purpose when we haven't and is just generally difficult to be around sometimes. I'm sure this behaviour is pretty normal to a degree, but how do I deal with such behaviours? Is some behaviour best ignored? I am new to the whole parenting pre-teens and have found myself a little taken back by it all. Thanks in advance!

OP posts:
rach2713 · 13/06/2015 22:41

Hi i have had the same problem with my son who is 8. His attitude is horrible it's kinda like Kevin off Kevin an Perry. I ask him to do chores around the house for packet money and he mutters things under his breathe I ask him to get a shower and he try every trick in the book not to. He ignores what I say the other day we had a fight over leg left on the floor I asked him to pick up before school cuz his sister would pick it up and it put him in a bad mood and as he walked out the front door shouted get me a present and my attitude will change I was gob smacked with what he said. He doesn't want for nothing I have always said if he's good he will get something but he's naughty he won't get nothing. I think he is jealous of his little sister and is just acting out which is annoying

Barberella40 · 14/06/2015 20:33

Tillytoes14.... Oh how I feel your pain. My beautiful gorgeous loving 9 year old little boy is turning into Jekyl&hyde... Apparently I'm ruining his life, and it's all my fault. He is becoming soooo rude whilst also having melt downs at the slightest things.. Getting him to school or bed leaves me utterly drained. Like you I am looking for answers of how to manage this as I actually am finding his behaviour hurtful and very upsetting especially the way he talks to me. However sometimes when I'm feeling strong (ie a good day and having a good nights sleep) I can ignore it and he quickly gets over it...but it doesn't stop the twisting in my tummy... So any tips you or anyone has would be very much appreciated... It's good to know it's not just happening to me though. Keep smiling..????

mordernlifeisrubbish · 24/06/2015 21:27

I also have one of these little treasures. He was such a lovely little boy, I don't know what has happened!

alanabanana85 · 06/01/2017 17:00

Hey ladies! Ive been reading this thread as I now have a very stroppy almost 9yo boy.
Its been 1 and a half years since you posted this, my question is to you... have they grown out of it? or is it worse? (yikes!)
He has turned into Jeckyl & hide, one minute he is kind and loving, the next he is stomping around, he also cant mix with certain kids (already hyper ones) it started off being just my step sisters 3 boys, then it moved on to my step brothers son, my friends son... he seems to play nice with his school friends, but just revs off the scale with the others? Im beginning to think that the problem lies with this "Golden Boy" of mines and not the others?

lollylegs · 26/02/2017 10:03

Hi, my lovely 9year old boy has also 'turned'. The head teacher at school had a talking to me on Friday about this behaviour at school and so did the tuck shop lady! I am at my wits end and wonder if this is a phase he is going through and when it will pass?! He is also so selfish and when he plays sport all he wants to do is be the one that bats, and not a very good team player. I am despairing for him that he won't have any friends by the end of the year! I hope you ladies have some words of wisdom???

Feather85 · 31/05/2018 18:45

It's so reassuring to read this and know it's not just my son that seems to have changed overnight! It's caused me lots of anxiety as it has come out of the blue. He seems to be pushing the boundaries and I feel like I'm constantly worried what mood he will be in. I'm a single mum and I find it hard dealing with it all mostly on my own.
I have been using descriptive praise and I have found that has been helpful 😊

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