What time is 'lights out' for your year six kids?

[Jinglebellsarenearlyhere]

so my DD age 11 is doing the can't get to sleep phase. Until now she's been asleep easily by 8pm but I wonder if this is too early.

Also what do you do with this age group of a weekday evening. I'm not used to her being around in the evenings and so she ends up mine crafting which adds to the problems.

Old routine was 5:30 I get home from work, do her supper. TV / computer off at 7. Bath, story, lights out 7:30, asleep by 8. Then DH gets home from work around 7:30 - 8 and it's supper, TV or chill out time.

Now she is around after 8. I feel my evening does not start until 9/10 and I'm cross and wound up.

Sorry bit of a rant. I need a new evening routine / pattern. What do you do?

DC age 9 and 10
Tv screen etc off at 8-8.30
Bed time routine, aim to be in bed by 8.45 - 9pm
Reading til 9.15 for 9yo and 9.30 for 10yo

Both up at 6.45

Weekends are much more relaxed depending on whaat we are doing but often not in bed til after 10 as no rush to get up in the morning.

I quite like them being up with me in the evenings.

It's allegedly 7:30, but in practice often later (until about 8:30).

There will be a Grand Official Change when she leaves primary and it moves to 9pm (rite of passage, as done for her DBros).

In rooms "making no noise and pretending they don't exist" (to quote Harry Potter) from 7.30-8, lights off 8.30ish, unless they have clubs that run later, in which case it's in, brush teeth, straight to bed. 9.30 latest.

11 year old in bed by 8.30 on school nights and has 30 mins reading time. Weekends depend on what we're doing but usually in bed by 9.30.

My DD (11) Yr 6 goes up at 9.00, lights out by 9.15. She has never slept more than 10 hours and averages around 9.5 hrs so there is just no point in going earlier - we have tried earlier bedtime but she just can't get to sleep and then ends up going to sleep later than the 9.00 bedtime.

I have a no laptop/phone time rule from 8.30 so she often watches tv with me - I make her turn over from Disney Channel/Nickolodian at 8.00 so we can watch something together - often have to sky plus suitable stuff.

9.00 seems pretty common at DDs school. Although as always some are earlier and some are later... I have explained to DD that it won't be much later than 9.00 for quite a few years!

9.30/10.00 at Fri/Sat night..

So an update - no screens after 6:30, upstairs at 7 if bath needed, 7:30 if not. Lights out at 8. This Is working really well. If she is having trouble sleeping she can read or do colouring (thank you so much to that suggestion,we have some of those mindfulness drawing books and it works So well).

She does get tired as we have to get up at 6:30am on a weekday but she is asking to go to bed earleier she is tired.

DS is 11 years old. On a school night he normally goes up about 8.30 and reads until 9pm. At weekends etc he still goes to bed about 8.30 but is allowed to watch a film until 9.30/10pm.

Really like the idea of closing the kitchen at 8pm - going to nick that idea!!

DS goes to bed ideally at 8.30 and is read to or 8.45 without being read to. Some nights it's later, scouts doesn't finish until 9.30.

Could she go upstairs at 8pm and her dad read to her for 20 mins so that they get sometime together and you get some time alone?

We don't have a lights out rule but DS doesn't have electronics after 7pm and definitely none in his bedroom.

Does she do any sports in the evenings? My DS does 4 out of the 5 week nights and I find that this helps enormously

cece They're talking about children in Year Six at primary school, so 10 and 11 year olds, not 6 year old children. Hth

My two (10 and 12) are generally upstairs between 7.30 - 8.00 with lights out on a "normal" weekday night around 8.30 / 8.45. There are at least 2-3 nights when bedtime is more like 8.30 / 9.00 due to clubs. Weekends bedtime is similarly 9.00ish.

For me, as someone who likes to be in bed by 10.30 at latest, I find the lack of quiet, adult time the hardest! Neither of my kids has any kind of gadgetry upstairs so if they're awake, they're downstairs under our feet! How on earth do you find time to chat as a couple / watch a film together etc when your kids are up till 9/10.00?
I'm beginning to realise why my parents always insisted on me having early bedtimes

My DD (11) goes upstairs about 8.15, gets ready for bed, reads a little bit, lights out by 8.45. Up for school at 7.40. If she went to bed any earlier she just wouldn't be tired enough. She stays up a bit later than this Fri and Sat nights.

DS (Y5) goes to bed 9-9.30pm simply because he has clubs that don't finish until 8.30pm. That gives him time for a quick shower when he gets home, somethimes a snack and then straight to bed.

When my DD was this age she wasn't doing any activities so she was generally in bed for 8.30pm. She has always need more sleep than her brother though did go through a phase of not being able to get to sleep. We bought a Bedtime Meditations cd to help her drop off and it worked really well.

She has since progressed onto the teenage version or she sometimes listens to Cabin Pressure or talking books to get her to sleep.

We have a 9pm bedtime during school (can be 8pm if long/hard week).

10pm on weekends/ holidays.

However I have a child that isn't keen on sleep and thinks 9pm is unfair. May have to show them this thread ;)

I remove all electronics and reading is encouraged in rooms for 8:30. However as my eldest is now yr 6 I don't mind if they are around of an evening time. As long as my child is quiet, and not bouncing around the furniture I don't mind my child being around til 10. Quite enjoy it, but have to be careful with TV programmes.

Up to his own bedroom with NO screens by 8pm on weekdays.

He reads, draws, listens to the radio and plays with lego.

Lights out at 9pm.

At weekends, its more relaxed. I let him watch telly or play on the wii until about 9-ish, then up to bed and lights out by 10-ish.

I don't enforce a set bed time for either of my children, and I think from what my friends have said re their children, I've been quite lucky with both son and daughter because they've self-regulated.

My 13yr old daughter tends to be asleep during term time by around 10 pm and my son, who's five, likes to go to bed at around 8pm on the dot (he's very routine oriented), straight after he's been bathed. My son wakes my husband and me up at 5:45 without fail, which is handy! It takes well over an hour for my daughter to be driven to her school and, of course the same back again, so I have to set off at around 7am. Due to our son's autism, he's home schooled by a home tutor, so he has the opportunity to have a sleep early afternoon.

DS 11: Gadgets off at 8.00 and straight to bed. Reading until 8.30 then lights off. Unless we are out it's the same at weekends. He is an early riser at around 6ish so needs this bedtime.