Can I ask about play dates for 9/10 yo boys?

[GlitterySparkles]

My DS has had only 2 playdates since September and no invites back. It's the problem we have had for years, that I work some if the week and the rest of the week DS has after school clubs. Should I be concerned?

Also, on a play date at this age, what do your DSs do? Is it all about xbox/PlayStation these days or is just a footie kick about and lego still acceptable?

How does DS feel about it?

My DS is 10, he has loads of mates but no special friend, so hasnt been invited ot a party for ages, because now they just seem to invite a couple of friends round . I was worrying about it but then i realised that he wasnt worried at all

He does have friends over occasionally, and yes it tends to revolve around DS and PC games. I work FT and DH is SAHD, he does a great job with the DC so doesnt engage much with mums at school pick up and drop off.. I honestly think he would be doing more play dates if I was the SAHP.. but who knows.

I am sitting tight, safe in the knowledge that in 6 months DS will be in a different environmnet at "big school" with a new set of friends. I should only worry if you think he is upset about it if I were you.

Could it be a location thing?
My ds has lots of friends but plays out after school when he doesn't have football etc.
So play dates are few as we can't always do them.
I get texts from one mum alot looking for ds to go over as he seems to be one of the few who doesn't have access to play out.
Most of ds friends play out and play dates are not as frequent.

Maybe the social scene for year 5 where you are is moving to playing out/kids arranging things between themselves and away from mums arranging playmates? My DS is 13 now but I think the shirt started to happen around then.

At that age, my ds would see friends at Cubs, or swimming lessons or football or whatever - they weren't doing much 'going home for tea' type meet ups.

Football kick about still favourite here but not lego any longer. FIFA on any screen next best thing.
There are very few children in our village so random playing out is rare. I make an effort to ask a friend round for tea about once a fortnight (DS is only child). Also one of his friends goes to the same sports club so quite often it's tea here or there between school and club session.

the boys decide together what they like to do.

At that age mine didn't really have 'play dates' he just played out with local kids.Or his friends just came round to play.

We luckily live on a modern estate full of families so loads of boys to kick a ball with etc, no formal playdates needed. Just kids knocking on each others doors and playing footie or riding bikes etc. I realise we're lucky , but thats why we chose to live here.

DS is still occasionally having a friend over to play, but more often they meet at the park and have a kick about. He wears a watch and has to be back by set time or I will come down the park and embarrass him.

my DS is year 4 aged 9.5. With some friends itr footie in park followed by FIFa. Once hates football so they squabble about what to do for about 2 hours then play lego for an hour and another is minecraft and den building.

Don;t worry about invites back - just keep inviting.

The more siblings they have generally the less they invite back.