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Preteens

Parenting a preteen can be a minefield. Find support here.

8yo daughter lacks motivation

3 replies

daybreakG74 · 17/10/2014 09:47

My 8yo daughter is going through a stage of ignoring everything we ask her to do, whether it is simple tasks like getting dressed for school or motivating her to do her best at at a task. I don't think she is doing it maliciously as she is generally a very happy, easy-going person. We have tried giving her a time limit on getting dressed in the morning (but we are still late every day and end up shouting at her); we have confiscated iPods and taken away TV time; we have tried being patient and encouraging. Nothing seems to work and she floats through the day oblivious to everyone. This is in complete contrast to her older 11yo sister, who tries her best at everything and does what she is told straight away. I realise that we spend a lot of time managing the younger child so that the older child ends up with less of our attention and this concerns me. I'm also concerned that the 8yo has started mumbling rather than talking clearly and is shown signs of poor self-confidence, but I'm struggling to find ways of boosting her confidence. Any ideas on ways to motivate her into action? We've tried marbles for pocket money, sticker charts, giving her rewards or the opposite, but nothing is working so far.

OP posts:
taxi4ballet · 17/10/2014 20:25

Has she been late for school?

daybreakG74 · 18/10/2014 08:53

Not yet, but we live over the road from school. She gets in just in time most days. Yesterday, I took her for tea and cake after school and we talked about things that may be worrying her, and it sound like she may be having friendship problems at school, so I'm going to investigate this further in case it is affecting her behaviour.

OP posts:
taxi4ballet · 18/10/2014 23:56

Good idea - she might be trying to avoid somebody in the playground...

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