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Parenting a preteen can be a minefield. Find support here.

Preteens

Oil of evening primrose? Or something else maybe?

2 replies

Stinkle · 12/09/2014 10:40

DD is 12, nearly 13. She hasn't started her periods yet, but I don't think they're far off to be honest

We have the usual door slamming, stroppy, nearly teenager behaviour, but at times, she's also extremely over emotional, tears at the drop of a hat, becoming overwrought.

Last night she completely broke down after stubbing her toe - she'd had a bit of an off day at school and got detention for forgetting homework, she dropped a glass on our stone kitchen floor, couldn't log into her school email and generally had a bit of a bad day. 99% of the time she'd shrug that kind of stuff off and move on, but stubbing her toe just finished her off and she burst into tears - proper snotty/sobby tears. After she'd calmed down she said she really didn't know why it had upset her so much, her toe didn't hurt but she just felt really over emotional.

This sort of reaction is really out of character for her, she's usually easy going and a bit airy fairy, door slamming and stropping aside, but I have noticed a bit of a monthly pattern to it, we had similar last month when we were out for dinner in the local pub and they'd changed their menu and no longer served something that she was really looking forward to having - we were out for my brother's birthday so I can pinpoint the date and it was exactly 28 days ago, and the previous month another similar reaction over something minor, again, we were at an event so I can pinpoint the date

I'm confident she's not being bullied at school or anything like that, she has a pretty good circle of close friends and she seems happy and doing well at school, we've had not big changes or anything at home and she doesn't seem anxious or upset.

She had the once over at the doctor a little while ago as I was worried about her - she was pale and very lethargic, dark circles under her eyes despite sleeping well, very spotty, etc. All fine but they recommended putting her on some vitamin and iron supplements which she's been on for a couple of months and she feels and is looking a lot better.

So, to get to the point, would oil of evening primrose or something like that help? Is this period/pmt/pms related do you think? Or a bit of normal pre-teen angst?

OP posts:
OscarWinningActress · 12/09/2014 10:51

Hi Stinkle,

Afraid I can't advise with regards to supplements but just wanted to let you know that I have a DD who is 12, going on 13 and she's exactly the same! I think the two things that cause the mood swings in our case are not going to bed early enough (she likes to read, draw etc in her room until way too late) and not eating properly/enough. That sounds terrible...what I mean is she often skips lunch at school because she's 'busy' doing this, that or the other (the school always have activities through the lunch hour and there just isn't enough time for them to finish their whole lunch). She then comes home and is often in tears until she's had something to eat and then she's lovely again. I think she may have mood issues when she gets low blood sugar--I'm the same Confused.

AugustRose · 12/09/2014 11:04

I can't offer any great advise other than to say my daughter is similar. She will be 13 in Feb so slightly younger but going through the same things. Your daughter must be in Year 8 now too, I know last year the change to secondary was huge for my own daughter after attending a very small primary. Even just the day to day carrying bags and having to walk from lesson to lesson made her very tired for months and ratty. She has now had two proper periods and in the months leading up she would get annoyed/upset more easily - she is not normally a tearful child but would cry for no reason.

Their bodies are changing so fast at this time and the return to school after the long summer might just be catching up with her. I have never suffered too badly with PMT (DH might differ!) but I know there are days when even the slightest thing annoys me, so it must be the same for them. I hope she feels better soon, maybe once her periods actually start things will settle down.

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