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So is this a preteen now?

12 replies

IDugUpADiamond · 27/01/2014 20:30

My 9YO DS has been doing some growing of late. His armpits smell awful if he doesn't shower every single day; after sports another shower is most definitely required. His room is starting to smell even though I change the sheets weekly and I ventilate every day. I have noticed a very faint upper lip shadow and today he found one pubic hair. He thought it was most hilarious, I thought he dealt with it in a lovely child-like manner and now I'm thinking he's at that stage where he's still a kid but changes are taking place... What can I expect now? Will he get a lot of noticeable pubic hair quickly? Can anyone recommend a book about this stage but not really about the physical changes more the emotional. Cheers all.

OP posts:
Tuhlulah · 27/01/2014 22:03

Hi, yeah, that's it, the dreaded puberty for boys. It may not progress rapidly, because he's just had a huge growth spurt by the sounds of what you've said. But with my DS (now 12 and a man cub) I first noticed genital growth and a few pubic hairs. Of course the smell. Genitals now adult size I think and lots of pubic hair. Hairs under arms are coming in now, and leg hair, and his voice has broken I think. Sometimes I call him and he responds and I think -'who let Brian Blessed in?'

I expect you'll get a bit of moodiness. And then the inevitable nocturnal emission. DS in his innocence shared that with me (!!!!!!!!) which led to me having the conversation about ejaculation and masturbation etc. (Where is this boy's father when the chips are down?) My husband bought him a book, as his contribution, although I'm not sure DS is that into it, as I suspect he googled everything he needed to know. Book looks OK and was highly recommended according to DH:Puberty Boy, by Geoff Price (nice manly name there), published by Allen & Unwin.

Apparently minerals like zinc make a big difference to pubescent children's moodswings, so you might google that too.

And if course I guess there will be the inevitable interest in the gender of choice. You may never know any of this, I guess.

Smell re room, I agree, it's a kind of old sock funk. So a nice effective gut gentle shower gel and definitely a shower/bath every day. Because they stink. I was teased dreadfully at school because I smelt (first time I have ever told any one that) so I was determined Ds wouldn't smell and if he did not to make him feel embarrassed at all. he couldn't care less and there appears to be a kind of kudos in stinking.

Spots will come eventually. Ds uses Simple facial wash, gentle so as not to strip the skin. Get him into having his own special cosmetics, maybe, so above all he doesn't find it a negative experience or an embarrassing one.

Facial hair comes much later i think.

Hope all goes well for your DS.

Oh, finally, I think the growth spurt can be physically exhausting so plenty of sleep is essential if you can manage that.

Tuhlulah · 27/01/2014 22:05

'effective but gentle', not colonic irrigation

Gladvent · 27/01/2014 22:07

OMG DS has just turned 9. I don't want any of this to happen yet! OP please tell me your lad is almost 10 so I can put my head in the sand for another 11 months at least?

Tuhlulah · 27/01/2014 22:23

Gladvent, I didn't want him to happen either. Still wonder where my little boy went. DS told me, 'I'm still here, but I'm just bigger then you now.' I tell myself we have to be thankful that Ds is healthy and normal.

It's weight related too, I think puberty hits when the child gets to a certain weight. So if you can stop feeding and put heavy books on your DS's head, that may keep things at bay for a while. But I bet boys are like weeds poking through concrete during the night. You put a sweet thing to bed at night and in the morning a giant gets out of it.

IDugUpADiamond · 28/01/2014 07:05

Tuhlulah thank you for your lovely reply, it is very useful. What you say about being tired really makes sense as I find that DS never wants to get out of the house and just wants to lie in bed reading books or playing with the computer.

The shower thing is becoming such an issue as DS suffers from eczema. He got away with 2 weekly baths up until a year ago but the current constant need for showers is wrecking havoc with his skin. It's funny how they don't notice they smell though...

Gladvent my DS will be 10 in June Sad. I am hoping this is a pre-warning that the pre-teen years are knocking on the door but not quite here yet because I need my little boy just a bit longer. It's shocking isn't it?

OP posts:
Tuhlulah · 28/01/2014 08:28

IDug, oh, eczema! DS has had that too but not to your DS's extent. Could any of the eczema helplines or the dermatology department at GOSH give information about products which don't irritate eczema? Or is it actually water contact? Oilatum is gentle but I guess you have already tried all the possibilities.

The other thing is: growth spurts can cause aches and pains. This may be vitamin D deficiency, so either ask your GP for some or get a reliable supplement. This will make a difference. DS always had pains in leg bones but this has stopped since we were prescribed vitamin D. Paediatric consultant told me that what they used to call 'growing pains' may well be vitamin D deficiency but this hasn't been sufficiently proven by research yet. Worked for us, but who knows why.

natellie1970 · 29/01/2014 09:06

My DS must be miles behind physically. He's 13 in March and he's definitely still a little boy but we do have the teenage moods with grunts rather than conversations won't talk about anything.

Seeline · 29/01/2014 09:12

My DS is 12 and still a little boy (apart from the moods). Lots of shouting and stomping Grin But no signs of anything else. I don't think it is weight related because he is quite big.

kikidee · 29/01/2014 09:19

This is a lovely thread, full of lots of useful info, very kindly given. My DS is almost 10 and only changes so far are an increased desire for bathroom privacy. He's started locking the bathroom door which he didn't use to do and doesn't like to come into the bathroom if anyone else is in there. Very tall but very slim so, taking the weight point into account, I shall stop feeding him I think. Grin

MrsJoeHart · 29/01/2014 10:05

Lovely thread. I was just searching for a thread about boys and puberty, DS is 11 and needs deodorant now and has slightly hairier arms but no other physical signs. However his emotions are all over the place, he's also always had growing pains (as did I) and they've got more frequent so thanks for the tip about Vit D.

Gladvent · 29/01/2014 10:21

I've noticed that DS doesn't smell but his bedroom/bedding does sometimes pong a bit more than it used to. Maybe it is the start. He has an Usborne book called 'what's happening to my body' or similar, and told me the other day that the left testicle tends to hang lower than the right to stop them knocking into each other. Well you learn something new every day!

Dotty342kids · 29/01/2014 12:51

My 9yr old DD is experiencing the same. A couple of times in the last month we'd got a whiff of BO but thought we must be imaging things so when I last did, I got close and had a good sniff (delights of parenting) and yep, it was her Sad
She was only 9 at the start of this month and is a teeny weeny thing so really wasn't anticipating any of this yet. She's always been quite petite and most of her older friends had put on some weight prior to starting to get curves so I thought I'd get some warning signs, but apparently not!
So, we went shopping for special deoderants, had chat about good shower etiquette and have looked at selected pages of a book about growing up. She didn't want to hear about periods (though she knows the basics anyway) or sex so am just taking things at her pace. Am hoping it'll be a good few months or longer, before any other signs of puberty come along.

My nearly 11yr old DS however, is showing no signs of it at all Grin though he'd really like to be! Still very much a little boy - and long may it stay that way Smile

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