12 year old DD, make up and arse showing shorts

[sandyballs]

My DD has changed from a tomboy who spent last summer climbing trees, not caring what she wore and rarely showering without an argument, to a willowy girl of 5ft 8 who is obsessed with her appearance.

I'm a bit sad this has started so young. Every day we have endless arguments about make up and inappropriate clothes. The reason she has these clothes and make up is thanks to MIL who seems to delight in buying her stuff more suitable to a much older teen. DD's argument is all her friends are the same and their parents don't mind.

MIL even bought her fake tan FFS. I've had words with her and I've asked DH to have sterner words today.

How did you stop your DDs growing up too quickly. On a trip to London last week I saw adult men looking at her, and I felt like shouting, "she's 12". She didnt have much make up on then and normal shorts but she still looked about 16, until she opened her mouth and then you can tell she's still very young.

I want my little soap shy tomboy back

[Mabelface]

I wouldn't argue, but would remove arse showing shorts and compromise on the rest. With make up, you'll be fighting a losing battle as she will sneak it out of the house, better to show her how to apply it properly so she doesn't look like she's been punched in the eyes.

[dingit]

Ahh, bless her, how I would love to be a willowy 5ft 8!

Not sure i have any words of wisdom, but she doesn't sound much different to most 12 year olds these days.

My dd nearly 15, goes from no make up, to it troweled on thick, I've now learnt to bite my lip, as she bristles at the first criticism.

She now has a boyfriend of a few months, now that is a whole new kettle of fish, and adding to my grey hairs daily!

[fortifiedwithtea]

My eldest DD is 15. We've been through the heavily made up stage and for the past year or so I can not believe how long it takes her to perfect the 'I am hardly wearing any make up look'. I swear it takes longer and sometimes she starts over again. She might as well not bother.

I think the daisy dukes will have to be mysteriously mangled in the washing machine .

[sandyballs]

Thanks all, glad to hear its relatively normal. I was still playing with cindy at 12. But maybe that wasn't 'normal'

[specialsubject]

sadly it is normal now. But shorts that show what you had for lunch are an ugly sight on any age and any size. Burn them.

[Mwirren]

oh the shorts! I had to wrestle a pair off my dd. I allowed her to keep a slightly less slutty pair.

[NoComet]

I'm lucky that DD2 hasn't had a major growth spurt so she can wear hot pants and make up and she still looks 12ish.

Therefore I don't worry about it. The less you notice, the less important it becomes and the more often you find your preteen on the trampoline or having a sneaky play with their playmobil.

I guess it's harder if your DD is tall and looks a lot older than they are. DD1 was tall at 12, but not anything like as fashion conscious and was, and at 15, isn't interested in teen culture. She doesn't have DD2's social skills, as soon as she talked you'd work out she wasn't particularly old.