How would you deal with this?

[CocktailQueen]

DD age 8 has a friend who is 7.5 but quite precocious. There has been a history of her upsetting dd - and most of the other girls in her class - by saying something rude/thoughtless/nasty/sarcastic. She has an older brother and is growing up way too fast imo.

Anyway, dd came home tonight in tears and didn't want to tell me why. Eventually she told me that her friend had said I was fat at lunchtime today, and dd had been mortified. [I am btw, I am size 18.] I said, 'well, I don't care what your friend thinks of me and nor should you! If she says something nasty then say 'I don't want to you to say that/please stop being nasty' or just ignore her.'

But dd is sensitive - she needs to toughen up a bit, I think - and she was very upset.

Anyway, how would you have dealt with it??
Thanks for any advice

I think what you said was good - let her see that you're not bothered by what this little girl is saying, lead by example and all that.

I would have, and have, done the same.

Ds is coming up for 5, his 'best friend' winds him up all the time saying horrible things and telling him his grandparents are going to die soon etc (close to bone just now).

I tell ds to ignore it (though I almost contacted his mum over the dying thing but she's so lovely and was having a hard time). I explain to ds that his friend does these thing to get a reaction and ds has to stop giving him one.

I think you said exactly the right thing.

Depending on how you feel about it, she could just say "I know". Agreeing with them usually knocks the wind out of their sails.

I'm an older mum (52) - my DS (10) has had new friends (especially those with very young mums) of his think I'm his grandma -I always laugh it off by saying that I am unusually old so he should just agree with them. After a while they see me as exactly the same as their mum. Incidentally I'm also size 18 - they don't seem to notice that!

Thanks tatty :)