I want to swing for him right now

[bonkers20]

As agreed I've come home an early from work to take DS (12) to his dance class. He's been at home for 3hrs because school had a 1/2 day. I also told him this morning that I wanted him to tidy his room before I got back. I took him shopping on Wednesday for kit he needs for a Scout trip and all the lovely new things are just chucked on the floor.

I get back, ready to turn myself around in 15 mins and find that he's sitting in his room in his school uniform, not tidied and all and nothing ready for dance.

I flew off the handle and said I wouldn't take him. What's a suitable punishment? This is typical of his behaviour these days. It's just all take, take, take with little thanks and no thought for anyone else in the family.

I'm not going to just let him get away with it because of his age.

My 12yo DS was acting like a knobhead recently. I took away the controllers to his x-box until he was up to date with ALL homework, had tidied his room (to my standards, not his) and had performed a minor household chore without being asked (he did the dishwasher). It probably won't be the last time I have to do it... Thanks for reminding me - I need to buy a new sleep mat for his Scout camp next Sunday!

No x-box to confisgate! He has now tidied his room, sent a txt to the dance teacher, done the end of the day tidy up and helped with bed time for other DS (2).

Where are all the other parents of 12 year olds then? Crying in a cupboard or down the pub or something. There's so much talk and advice on how to deal with trying toddler behaviour but not much for teens...is there?

you need to work out what is most important to him and hit him where it hurts! Luckily my lump of a son hasn't hit moody hormonal 'Kevin' stage, he just seems to be on a different planet (planet Minecraft as we speak). It's gonna be a bumpy ride!

i would say that is enough punishment.

he has missed his class and he has then made amends (maybe?) by letting the teacher know, doing the room like he should have and helping with his brother's bedtime

that seems fair to me.

I agree, I was just thinking ahead for the next time!

Thanks. Yes, he's paid the price I think. No telly or computer seems to be a fitting punishment most of the time. It's just so tedious isn't it. Sigh. He's a good lad really (he's asleep now so that always helps!). Tomorrow is another day. He chose "Guess how much I love you" for a bed time story for DS2 and sat on the bed reading with us.