options for 3.5yo DS - need some advice!

[jesska]

I posted a while back about interviews for DS1 who is now almost 3. We've been offered a place for him at 2 private schools near where we will be living (we're expats now, returning this summer...long story; we're moving to Dulwich). He will be 3.5 in September when he starts pre-k (kindergarten? the year before reception, in any case - so sorry, I am american and I still can't quite work out what nursery/preschool/playgroup all means exactly!)

So.... the options are school 1, which is co-ed, probably a 15-20min walk from us, and seemingly very friendly and warm based on our one visit (we made a special trip back to the UK to have DS seen for interviews). They admit students who are on the list before too many are signed up (so, not competitive/assessed). He would start on 5 mornings plus 2 afternoons, gradually increasing to 4 full days and one morning by the time the year is over. This is somewhat horrifying for me, since he now only goes 2x to a preschool where we are, and I quite like having him around. It seems awfully early to send him off nearly full time! (or maybe I will be glad of it by then? He has a 16mo little brother too)

School no. 2 offers places based on assessment, and DS was offered a part-time afternoon spot. (I think I must have said we were open to this on the application). At first I had decided we wouldn't send him to this school because it is single-sex, and I don't really think I want him to do single sex primary school. That said, it is tempting to send him there for a year because he can go part time. And it is a bit closer. For reception year, we were planning to try to get him into the village school (hugely oversubscribed, naturally!) or the other local private which is co-ed, but only takes from 4+.

Does anyone have advice for me? I think the only thing pushing me in the direction of school 2 is the ability to send him part time for one more year(or at least a term or so). That said, am I just being selfish? Will he be driving me nuts or will the afternoon session completely mess with ds2's afternoon nap (which he will most definitely still need that year).

Any and all advice greatly appreciated!

Aack. Ok so actually I need to post a big "nevermind!". I just clarified with school 2 what exactly part-time afternoons mean (5 days, from 1-3:15 - please don't ask me why I didn't clarify this before saying Yes on the form, I have no idea!) and there is no way this would work for us. His little brother would never get a decent nap! So I guess school 1, here we come...

So sorry for the misfired post! I totally mucked up his application to school 2, so I suppose I'm glad I really wanted him to go to school 1 anyway! clearly i had reason to be intimidated by school 2. sigh.

Will school 1 take him for fewer hours? I can't see the need for doing nearly full-time before reception, as it is a big enough shock to their systems then, unless you need it for childcare reasons...

If you are trying to get into the village school, is there not a village pre-school/playgroup where the other local children go? I assume most don't send them to a private school just for one year? Don't feel bullied into sending him for more hours than you want - he doesn't actually have to go anywhere yet.... Good luck with the move.

Don't reject school 2 solely on the basis of a nap (which in 7 months time may be totally different to what is happening now). My DD had to adapt her nap round nursery pickups and managed to cope!!

You will be able to put him down for a nap when you get home and if he's still a bit sleepy when you need to pick up he can doze in the car/push chair (in fact if you're walking he could just sleep in the push chair full stop).

That said, I was preferring school 1 and it sounded as if you preferred it too. Do you have to do the increase in hours (ie is it something they make you sign up to in advance?) If not you could just stick to 5 mornings. Though as he's one of the oldest you may find he is ready for longer days by the end of the year.