How on earth do you decide??

[BettyButterknife]

DS will be 3 in July, a week after my DC2 due date, so he'll be eligible to start pre-school in September.

He currently has a mish-mash of childcare arrangments - 2 days with me, one day with his dad, one day alternating grand-parents, and one day at nursery (full day, 9-6). Although he's been going to nursery since his first birthday, he still cries most days when I drop him off. I don't think he's unhappy there, I just think it's unfortunate that it falls on a Monday after a weekend with both parents - I think he misses us.

Anyway, I'm trying to decide what to do with DS in September with regards pre-school. The options are:

1. keep him where he is but increase the hours,
2. put him in the pre-school of the primary we'd like him to go to (but obv no guarantee he'll end up there as it isn't closest to us),
3. or pre-school of the primary he might end up at (closest).

The first option is tempting because I'm likely to go back to work in April 2011, so logistically it's practical, and it would guarantee only one big move (when he goes to primary), and would cover summer hols 2011. But he's been there since his first birthday - I worry he might be bored.

The second option would be great if I knew that's where he'd go to school, but if he doesn't then that's two big moves - disruptive? - and is only term-time, so we'd have to arrange holiday cover.

The third option is a bit of a wild-card, but the pros and cons are similar to number 2.

Sorry, I know this is very long and convoluted, but seriously - how on earth do you decide what to do when there are these kinds of variables?

Thanks...

There probably is no ?right? answer and as you?ve surmised yourself, every solution has pros and cons.

Some things you could consider:

• What is provision like at the pre-school age range in your current nursery? DS?s old nursery was great for the little ones but not so great at this age range.
• A day care type nursery is likely to be slightly different to a pre-school attached to a school. In that the school pre-school may be more structured, have a teacher in, have more links with school. Do you have a strong preference?
• What schools are children at his current nursery likely to go to? (ie is ?someone? likely to end up at his future school)
• Bear in mind that once you?re actually in the pre-school attached to a school your view of that school may change (either positively or negatively)
• Consider what your holiday cover would be if you went with the school pre-school option. Would grandparents do a day each (so with dad?s cover you have 3 days covered). What/are there holiday playschemes in the area for 3 year olds? (many won?t take till 4 or even 5) Does the school provide anything?
• Contact headteachers and/or LEA to find out realistic chance of you getting into your preferred school.

For what it?s worth, both my children went to a day care type nursery up till pre-school age. DS stayed at the day care nursery for practical reasons ? 2 of them in same place, couldn?t find any cover for school holidays, but that did mean he struggled slightly in his first term at school (most other children knew each other, he wasn?t accustomed to school ways). DD is in the school nursery (as now most practical option plus benefits of meeting children she?ll be at school with ? though her best friend is going to a different school). Both were the right decisions at the time for both of them.