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Preschool education

Get advice from other Mumsnetters to find the best nursery for your child on our Preschool forum.

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Original poster

Anyone considering deferring their child from school in September?

8 replies

Barmymummy · 07/03/2009 17:15

My DS is 3yrs 9mths and due to start school in Sept. I have a few little concerns about him with his social/emotional development - (just think he is taking a little longer to get there that's all) but it is making me wonder if he would do better to stay at playschool to build on these skills before starting school a term later in Jan 2010.

He doesn't really 'play with' other kids yet as such, just alongside them. Playschool don't really have any issues as such with him but he also shows the typical male fidget bum syndrome lol!! This kid can't sit/stand still to listen to anyone without fidgeting or making irritating noises! I think (must check lol!) that he sits and listens as story time though. When he is actively involved in an activity he is fine.

Just wondering if anyone has any little kids going through a similar thing and what your thoughts are?

Thanks!

OP posts:

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simpson · 07/03/2009 20:34

My Ds is 3.6 and due to start school full time in Sept too.

He will be the youngest in the class and if he was a day younger would be starting a whole year later They don't do an intake in Jan.

He goes to the pre school attached to the school 5 afternoons a week and seems to be doing well there but has total melt down when he comes home from tiredness and I worry that he won't cope with being at school all day iyswim.

VinoEsmeralda · 07/03/2009 20:50

Another one here, my DD is 3.7 and think she will really struggle. Next week profile meeting with her teacher and will be interested in her point of view.

Original poster

Barmymummy · 08/03/2009 07:03

Its so worrying isn't it. My DD is 6 now but was a mid August baby and she was way more mature than my son is at the same point! IF I sent him in Sept he would only go part time until January but if I send him in January he will go full time.

Having had another child go through reception I know its very gentle etc BUT its still school and assembly, carpet time and lining up/being quiet is going to be all but impossible for my little man to cope with at the moment! He wants and needs to be running wild in the park, not in a classroom.

OP posts:

seeker · 08/03/2009 07:46

It's hard isn't it? The problem with starting later than everyone else is that the school will be geared up to settling them in and teacheing them how to "do" school, and will obviously be less so in September, so he might be overwhelmed by all these capable children who know where the loos are and how to manage their lunchboxes. And who have formed relationships (in so far as they do at this age)

Have you thought about doing quite a long stretch of mornings only? I did this with mine - he didn't go full time til after Christmas (although to be honest, that was my needs not his - he was begging to stay for the afternoon in the end!)

MollieO · 09/03/2009 08:54

Sounds like mine last year. Normal boy behaviour and at that age they don't really play together. Still don't and he is now 4.9. I would be guided by his nursery teacher but he sounds fine to me.

purepurple · 09/03/2009 09:42

reception year should not be formal schooling, as the children still come under the early Years Foundation Stage, which is play based and not the national curriculum, which is based on teaching to the test.

we as parents need to start putting pressure on schools to stop the pressure coming down from key stage 1 for children to start formal education before they need to.

children are not leaglly required to start school until the term in which they turn 5, but they will go to the year they would have been in and not the reception year, so they will miss out as the class will have been together for a while and will have formed their friendships.

Seeline · 09/03/2009 09:50

My DD started Reception in September having turned 4 at the end of July. She loves school - and her social skills have really developed sice being there. She really didn't play with other children at nursery, but having just had her teacher consultation, I am satisifed that she is playing with most of the children in teh class now! I think delaying her start until January would have been very difficult for her - the other children would have made friends. They would know where everything was, how to cope with school dinners, changing for PE, school routine, and it would ALL have been totally new for her. She would also have been behind in terms of 'learning' (such that it is at this stage of school). Certainly for my daughter, it was the right decision to start with the others in September. For what it's worth nobody deferred entry in her class where I think there are 7 of them with July/August birthdays.

AtheneNoctua · 09/03/2009 09:59

Barmy,
My DD was just like your DS, although her birthday is in March so a bit older than your DS at the September start of school. She came along fine and blended in with the class. I think if you hold your son back and then drop him into a class full of kids who all know each other but of whom he knows none that that will do more to hold him back than it will to help him. If you have a chat with the teachers they might actually say that his behaviour is fine and he will fit right in as there will probably be others just like him. Our school has a quite a lote of free play in the Foundation years and so kids who choose to play alone can do that until they are comfortable joining in with the others. You might want to ask about the school's approch to these things?

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