Can I insist that head teacher at DS foundation unit changes his newly allocated key worker?

[DungunGirl]

Hi

Long story but my son has additional educational needs and has a mild problem with communication.

He has been at his foundation unit since September and has been happy as larry. He was there with his best mate and he became very attached to his teacher/key worker.

Best mate has left the unit and last week his teacher left too.

This week DS has been crying everyday at school and finds it hard to make new friends as his speech is that of a 2.5 year olds even though he is 4 next week.

His new key worker seems rubbish. I found out he has been upset everyday from another teacher and am angry that his key worker thought it unimportant to mention.

He is also as good as fully toilet trained, but this week he has wet himself every other day.

Am I within my rights to insist that the new allocated key worker is not providing the support he needs and ask for a different one?

Sorry your DS is unhappy - it is a big upheaval losing your friend and a teacher so close together.

I wonder, rather than changing his keyworker, whether it might be best to go and meet the new teacher and talk to her. Let her know a bit more about your DS's problems and that he has lost his friend which she may not be aware of. Let her know what you expect from her (to be told of any upset for example). She might have considered it to be a minor matter, especially if your DS got over it during the course of the day. Presumably she is key worker to other children too and didn't realise whose parent was whose - I should imagine the first week is a bit a struggle getting to know everybody. I would give her the benefit of the doubt just this once.

If she then didn't seem any more sympathetic I might be asking for a change but I do think you need to give her a chance.

Niecie

Very sensible advice. Thank you.

I have met her and had a short chat with her at the beginning of the week. She seemed up to speed with DS's situation and said that his former teacher had briefed her about him.

She also made reference to a Home-school link book we have which is in place for the keyworker and myself to share information about DS.

She has made no mention of his crying in this book.
In fact she has not written ANYTHING this week.

I feel horrible judging her so early on, but I do believe in 'gut feeling' and when I first met her, she seemed frosty. Unlike the other teachers who are warm and welcoming, she seemed rather stand-offish.

DS respond well to carers who are warm and motherly. This lady is not that type.

I just feel in my gut she is the wrong person to help him through this emotionally difficult time.

Well, if you have met her and she has no excuse for ignorance then maybe you should speak to the unit manager/head teacher.

The only thing I would say in defence of the new teacher is that she is new and some people do appear a bit frosty and stand-offish as a result of nerves. She might mellow with time.

The question is, I suppose, how long will you have to wait for her to loosen up and can your DS cope?

I would challenge her on what she has written in his book and ask why she hasn't put anything. Maybe she doesn't realise how important it is to you. DS2 started in Yr R in September and his teacher had nothing written in his homelink book so I asked her to tell me if certain things had happened and she has done that. It shouldn't be an issue if you ask for the same courtesies.

I do understand that you don't want to waste time making allowances for this woman whilst your little boy is so sad. Much sympathy - I hope things improve soon.

it is not too late to build up a relationship with his key person. how about suggesting a meeting where you can get a proper idea of his progress and then you can mention the book and let her know exactly what your expectations sre. Do you write in the book too? If you don't then she might be thinking that you don't place any importance on it. Just a thought

I have written 2 entries since new key worker took over, last one was asking for an update on the first week so far, Friday came and nothing was written.

I have a meeting with the head teacher this morning , so I am going to spill all my concerns to her and see what her response is.

I was in tears this morning after taking DS to school as I saw that he tries so hard to make friends with the other boys but because of his speech, he gets ignored. And worse, one boy actually tried to hide from him. Broke my heart.

This morning as well DS refused to get ready for school. He didn't want to go. He has always loved school and it has never been an issue... I am really worried we will fall into DS hating school.

Anyway, yeah saw his key woker this morning, she didn't greet DS, didn't even smile, just rushed past

Hi, just wondered how you got on with the head this morning.

Thanks for asking.

The Head teacher really put my mind to rest. She is super good!

She acknowledged that the new key worker was not fulfilling the role DS requires of her at this present moment. Seems she has also got a little girl on her hands who has anxiety and separation issues and she is tending to give most of her time to her.

So Head has agreed to realocate DS to another teacher....on paper the other lady will still be his key worker but for all intents and purposes his class teacher is now taking on the role of supporting him through this difficult emotional time.

Head also acknowledged that this other teacher may be a better fit for now as she is a much gentler and soft spoken character which she knows DS responds to well.

So yeah...all in all very good.

I am glad as well as yesterday morning for the first time ever DS actually was reluctant to go to school and this is very unlike him. He has always loved school. So am glad that Head Teacher has been so good and supportive about the whole situation.

Hooray for the understanding head and well done for getting it sorted.

Hope things start to improve. Good luck.