dd (3.2) claims not to like anyone and not to have any friends (sad)

[Jenkeywoo]

My dd was 3 in august and started playgroup in September - she has always been happy to go and talks enthusiastically about what she has been doing. She is very cheeky and chatty and from what I know of her gets on well with other children - talks to everyone at toddler groups and will go up to children she doesn't know at parties etc.

Anyway last week her keyworker mentioned to me that dd was starting to 'interact with other now' - she said that she prefers to play alone but they have now got her joining in and playing alongside others and sometimes playing with others. I was quite shocked and a bit sad really.

I've since talked to dd on several occasions and when I ask who she played with today she said 'nobody' - she told dh tonight that she doesn't like the boys and doesn't like any of the girls either. She also says she doesn't like playgroup (yet never ever gives me that impression when I drop her off).

I don't want my dd to be the kid with no friends - she is such a lovely kind little girl with a really funny sense of humour so I just don't get it.

What do you think I should do? half of me thinks just leave it be but I am thinking of talking to her keyworker - just worried I will make it worse. The good thing is that her keyworker is lovely and looks out for her. My dd has a little sister who has cerebral palsy and although she is only 3 she is very grown up and very very caring; but she does have a lot on her plate and in some ways is 'old before her time'.

I just want her to be happy and have friends but I don't want to make a problem out of nothing

Playing 'alongside' rather then with other kids is perfectly normal at 3 , as is saying no one plays with you, they're in a bit of a no man's land between being selfish and learning to be social IYKWIM . Try not to be too bothered about it as DD might be picking up the twinges of anxiety and telling you what you want to hear. I gave up on asking after DS1 kept saying no one would play with him at nursery, when we talked to the teachers, they were mystified as he was usually at the centre of things. DS2 has also come back saying he hates everyone, then the next day is full of how he's been 'looking after' so and so and playing with 'his kids'
they're honestly on a different planet at that age!
Lisa x

My ds has said very similar things (he doesn't like the other children at Pre-School and doesn't play with them), but I have it on good authority from the Play Leader that he is very friendly with A, O, W and L!

God knows why he spins me such a load of baloney

Goes with the territory when you're 3 i think, along with the ridiculous fears - DS2 was frightened of the grids in block paving, and of my computer screensaver(windows flag) WTF???

Thanks for the reassurance - looks like Dd was spouting baloney! I talked to the mummy-teachers today and they said she is very chatty and always surrounded by a little group of girls.