dd getting extremely upset when time to come home!

[knat]

This is dd's second year at preschool (will be 4 in Oct) and she has had issues regarding certain times within the preschool timetable (ie tidy up time and snack time - where she will get upset or angry) So far this year she has not wanted to go to school every day although she will keep saying this she does not cry (yet!!!) her time is there is mixed sometimes we have the same problems as last year and other days are better the problem i have now is that every day she also says she doesn't want to come home. Today she was absolutely hysterical when i collected her sobbing her heart out and screaming and it took a while before she calmed down and i could bring her home. We then get home walk onto the drive and she shouts my home - i'm home really happy!!!! Anyone any ideas as this is getting really upsetting (its the second time she's been this upset and most days she's reluctant to leave!) any help please please please!

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sounds very like dd and yes she used to be like that after afternoon naps. I think maybe i will try that although i did take her out crying last week but its more difficult when she has no shoes on and is so upset but may well try this no attention again (although im hoping there wont be another one as bad - i could hear her screaming when i was outside the school gates and she was in teh classroom(!)

Ah yes. Ds did this when I picked him up from nursery. No helpful advice, apart from to not say to a fellow parent, as I did, "it's because I lock him in a cupboard when we get home". Her face!

thanks tellus! Well this morning has been awful start again - last year all i had to worry about was whether she had been ok when there this time, she kicks off about going to school (this morning was awful but there were a lot of children not wanting to go this morning although where the others were crying and clingy my dd was stroppy!), how she is when she's there and now how she is about coming home - i'm trying to be positive but i am absolutely dreading picking her up for fear of a repeat performance of yesterday - nothing seems to work at the minute and i'm becoming a nervous wreck. Her behaviour at home after being absolutely brilliant over the latter half of the summer holidays has deteriorated aswell so am now just at the end of my tether and feeling very bad mum with a very upset, confused little girl!

It sounds as though she finds transitions difficult. My ds2 used to find this difficult. What really helped was when he was given a picture card of what was going to happen next, eg just before snack-time he was given a small picture of a snack and told "Snack-time, ". If they do this before each transition it can help with the anxiety.

dd1 does this

coppertop gets it spot on with transitions

we are having big problems with school, when she goes in, when she moves rooms, dinner time, playground etc

if she stays in one place she is fine

she is fine at home

could you mention to the staff to warn her when she will be expected to start to get ready to go home?

thanks - i agree about the transition - school have tried the picture card technique with limited success and also a countdown but if anything this time round this just seems to heighten the problem (when it comes to snacktime they have tidy up time before hand where they put music on the minute she hears th emusic she starts to get upset).
I really think the school ( who have been brilliant at trying things with her) are getting a little bit tired now because as i said before its not just her behaviour at snacktime its coming and going as well!

hi dd back at school this morning and it was terrible - didnot want to go wailing all the way up the road this is the fourth week now and its getting worse - on Wednesday last week (which was her last day last week) she did the whole clingy/crying thing when i left her which she hasn't really done before jsut lots of shouting before, and apparently she was like that half of the session, crying and saying she wanted to go home! This year is so much worse (i thought last time was bad!) and its just getting harder and harder - nothing seems to work!