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Changing nurseries after 1 year? WWYD? Bit long...

4 replies

spaghettina · 17/01/2012 10:57

Hi,
Just wondering what to do as I have to confirm my DD's state nursery place by tomorrow if we want to send her back in September (we're in Italy, so it's a different system).

My DD seems happy where she is, and settled in really well in September, but I and DP have never particularly liked the nursery we ended up being allocated, it's private-run but has subsidised state places.
It was quite low down my list of choices and we find it to be a bit old-fashioned and the staff not very communicative - parents are asked to keep out of the actual nursery area (except for the settling in period) and we get very little feedback about DD's development, activities, etc.
The owner seems professional but quite rigid and seems annoyed if you ask her about anything. The emphasis is on "teaching discipline through play", but we never see any of the paintings or anything DD does, not once has she brought something home.

BUT - and this is why we've kept her there - DD, 21 months, seems to really enjoy going! She is positively excited to get there in the mornings, most days, and has really bonded with 2 of the staff. She even asks for her favourite teacher sometimes on weekends or during the holidays.
Also, they've said that she's really come out of her shell recently, and while initially she was a bit shy with the other kids, she now approaches them to play (yes, last week they actually gave me some feedback for once!)

So, would it be a bad idea to trying moving her to a new nursery at the beginning of September, when she'll be nearly 2.4?
I'm worried it could be unsettling for her. Our home environment isn't always particularly calm as we're going through major relationship problems - which could realistically lead to a separation - so I really want her to feel confident and happy at her daycare. We can't afford a private place, but I'd try to get her into a much better state-run nursery in our area.

Sorry about the long, rambling post. Would love to hear your thoughts.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
spaghettina · 17/01/2012 12:22

bump

OP posts:
BranchingOut · 17/01/2012 12:26

Well, at this late stage I think I would only consider withdrawing her from the nursery if you definitely knew that another nursery in the area was actually better.

iwantavuvezela · 17/01/2012 12:26

If she is happy i would keep her there .... you have no idea if she will adjust to the new place and this could be really unsettling for her, especially if there might be other changes coming up for her - my advice would then be to keep what you can stable around her. (I agree with you and what you describe in her nursery sounds quite old fashioned) - but as your dd is happy; confident; making friends, i wouldnt change that just yet.

I had to change my daughter's nursery when we moved area to a new nursery. It was very diffiuclt process as she missed her old nursery very much!

spaghettina · 17/01/2012 14:51

Thanks for your replies. There are definitely better places in the area, I know this from having visited them and talked to friends etc., but I think you're right, theoretically it's best to keep things stable even though we're not really happy with the nursery itself.

Forgot to mention they have a practice of having a paediatrician come in and examine the kids one by one every 2 weeks or so, to make sure they're not coming down with anything, not that that seems to make any difference to the number of colds and coughs that are going around.. (and we take her to her own doctor anyway if she's under the weather).

We actually opposed this, and said we wouldn't have DD examined without one of us being present, or otherwise not to examine her at all. She's not been seen by the paediatrician since the first check up - unless they've examined her without telling us...
They told us this was the first time in 16 years that a parent has complained about this "additional service". I'm sure in the UK that wouldn't even be allowed...I mean full strip -naked check ups by a male doctor without parents but with the nursery staff holding the kids down if necessary. Confused
Anyway, am rambling now but this is one of the reasons we don't like the nursery particularly.

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