We are not quite as rough as that title suggests 
Dd is 3.10yo and has been going to preschool since September, she does three mornings a week, alongside private nursery, which she does two full days at. She's a busy girl.
I had contemplated taking her out of preschool, but she has always seemed to enjoy it, and although she's never particularly keen to go, always looks like she's had a good time when I pick her up. This is in contrast to private nursery, which she absolutely adores, and begs to go to on a Saturday and Sunday.
Whilst I understand that the level of strictness and formality will be different in a school environment, I've never been very enthused by the atmosphere of the preschool classroom. But we have soldiered on, in the knowledge that she is not going to that school in September.
So, to this morning:
Dd has started crying when we drop her off. This is a relatively new development, as I say, in the past she was never excited to go, but nor did she cry. Protocol is that you stay for the first fifteen minutes, and then they call 'Carpet time' and the carers/parents leave. This morning dd was particularly upset. My mum was on the carpet trying to comfort her, tell her she'd have a lovely time, that kind of thing, and the teacher came over and said, 'Come on now, dd, you're being a very silly girl.' My mum (who is a bit of a softie), said, 'Actually, she's not being silly, she's upset.' Incidentally, telling dd that she is silly is a bit of a red rag to a bull.
The teacher completely ignored my mum, once aagain told dd she was being silly, and then just started to call the register.
My mum got up and left, and the TA followed her out. She told my mum that children are 'manipulative, and very clever', and that dd doesn't behave like this when I drop her off. This isn't strictly true, although I would guess that I am a little firmer when I am leaving than my mum is. My mum told the TA that she was unimpressed with the lack of empathy shown in the classroom, due to their age. TA said, 'They are not babies, she is only doing it for attention'. My mum said she didn't understand why all of a sudden dd had started getting distressed when leaving her, and said something like, 'A friendly face in there wouldn't go amiss'.
They left it there, I think, because ds was whinging in his pram. I rang to speak to the Head, not to start a war , just because I felt that the situation needed acknowledging, as it had been my mum there and not me. She was unavailable, and the nosy receptionist asked me to outline what had happened in great detail. She was calling dd by the wrong name, and not understanding me clearly.
I know the Head will call me back and the whole thing will have been made out to be much more of a drama than it needs to be, and I'm not sure of the receptionist's ability to downplay things. She said, 'So TA called dd manipulative?' I said that hadn't been what I said, but I know that that is what she will tell the Head.
Ultimately, I feel a bit of a storm in a teacup. I am, however, unhappy at the general warmth and atmosphere myself, the Teacher and the TAs never say hello when you walk in, that kind of thing. They're just a bit, well, unfriendly.
Any advice?