Deferring primary school - Scottish system

[Mairi261]

Hi I wonder if anyone has some useful experience to share with me - I've seen some stuff on the site but about the English school system, we are in Scottish system.

My son will be 4 in December and is currently in pre-school (at a private nursery as we both work). In theory he can go to school in August next year, intake is up until Feb after he turns 5.

We have suspected for a while now that he would benefit from deferring school for another year (ie he would start when 5 1/2). Academically he is doing well, but emotionally he is still very young, eg can get very upset/tearful when tired, still not great toilet training etc (forgets when he is busy sometimes) - not huge problems but we worry he would get bullied/picked on in the playground.

Nursery agree with us, and have said very strongly they think he would get a lot more confident staying another year in pre-school - they will make sure he doesn't get bored, and there will be other kids in the same boat who will be in his group etc.

Wondered whether others have been through the same decision or not? Concerns I have are (1) we have to decide by end of this year, when we really don't know how he will mature over the next year; (2) cost of another year's nursery, we will get no state funding as he has a Dec birthday; (3) worried he will feel "left behind" as his friends move on.

Obviously I want what is best for him and we will find the cash but how on earth do I know I'm doing what's right....?

I have a dd who has a January birthday, so we didn't have the funding problem, but otherwise we worried about the same things as you. We decided to defer. I remember the sense of unexpected relief I had when we made the decision; I haven't regretted it yet (she'll start next year when she's 5.5). I worried about the friends moving on thing the most, however her two closest friends (they go to the same childminder) are going to go to different schools anyway so that wasn't an issue in the end!

Quite a few people at my work have deferred/are going to defer, and not one of them has a bad thing to say about it.

All the best to you and your DS

I've been a nursery teacher for several years (Sotland too) and my problem with th is situation is that children with Dec birthdays don't have an automatic right to deferral that Jan/Feb birthdays do. The nursery would have to make a strong case for deferring his entry to Primary 1. I always feel this is such a shame as so many children would benefit from the extra year to mature and grow. I hope it works out for your DS.

Thanks for the useful advice.

I really wish that in England you were allowed to defer your child's place at school. Theoretically, children don't have to start school until the term after their 5th birthday in England, so an August child, who would normally start Reception in September aged only just 4, could start the following Septemeber aged just turned 5. However, in England the child is then placed in the 'correct' year group, and so would miss the Reception year altogether and go straight into Year 1 as pretty much the youngest there, and start more formal education than he/she would have received in Reception. As a teacher I know that the lower ability group of children in classrooms is often made up of the youngest/most immature children in the class, and I'm sure that if they had been allowed another year to 'grow up' a bit more before starting school then they would be coping a lot better. So if you, and your son's nursery, agree that he would be better off wating another year, then I think it would probably be best for him to wait a year.