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Preschool education

Get advice from other Mumsnetters to find the best nursery for your child on our Preschool forum.

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Original poster

Tantrums after Nursery

9 replies

lxoc · 13/09/2010 14:43

I have just started my son at nursery he is nearly 3 years old...He was extremely shaky on the first day but has, over three nursery mornings, become adjusted to the dropping off process...which I thought was incredibly fast adjustment and was very pleased....however he has started to become very angry...shouting orders, having tantrums (he has never really had before) and being generally displeased when I pick him up! He mentioned that he was thirsty one day(he drinks a lot of water at home) so I made sure that his leader knew that he should be directed to water every so often and he isnt a big fan of fruit so I made sure that he had other snacks available to him...but this has not had any impact He sleeps 11 hours at night and 2 hours in afternoon so I think that he gets as much sleep as he needs...

What can I try next?

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MamaVoo · 13/09/2010 21:42

I'm not sure if I can be much help as my son, who's also nearly three, has only done two mornings (third one tomorrow). Although he goes in without too much fuss, he has cried when I pick him up. A couple of the more experienced mums have told me that's quite normal - he just doesn't know any other way to express his relief that I've come back. Also he's very tired by the time I pick him up and I think that contributes to it.

I think it's just a case of giving them time to adjust rather than there being a solution.

AlCrowley · 13/09/2010 21:44

Sounds like he's tired (mentally from taking in all the new stuff at nursery rather than physically tired) and maybe hungry.

Try having quiet time when you get home, I find Cbeebies works for my 3 year old. Not much, just maybe half a hour where he can relax and get used to being at home again. Give him a favourite snack/lunch and a drink too.

It'll get better as time goes on and he gets used to being there.

Original poster

lxoc · 14/09/2010 17:34

thanks for the advice ladies...today was a different day...spoke with head teacher and yes you are both right....He like all of us just needed time to unwind after school...I think I put too much pressure on by asking too many questions after end of nursery...I left him alone today...gave him a snack and drink while I pushed him home and then waited for him to come to me with any news...We had lunch together and then he went peacefully to bed fo a couple of hours...I will sleep beter tonight....

OP posts:

mamadoc · 14/09/2010 22:26

Just to say you're not alone.
DD started preschool 3 days a week last week. She is used to being away from me as she was at a CM for same hrs before but she's not used to so many other children.
She has been really excited and happy to go, no tears at all but her behaviour at home has been terrible.
Tears or screaming over the slightest thing, waking up early which she hasn't for years.
I am resigning myself that its to be expected and will pass!

AlCrowley · 15/09/2010 07:44

Glad it helped.

My DS is only 3 days into his 2nd term at pre-school but I definitely found having some downtime when we got home helped his behaviour, especially as he doesn't nap anymore.

JimJammum · 22/09/2010 20:05

Late to this message, but just wanted to add that my ds (3.8) has just started pre-school for 5 sessions a week after being at CM for 2 days a week. His behaviour has been dreadful, esp as normally he's so good, with tantrums, frustration, trying to push/hit, stubbornness, tears, arguments. Has also been quite tired due to getting up early over weekend. TBH I can't believe his little morning at school can be that exhausting, but I can't think of anything else it can be.....
How long does this last? At the moment, not enjoying our time together as I just seem to be spending alot of it fielding drama and disciplining bad behaviour. I have allowed him a bit of Cbeebies when he gets in, as quiet time but it seems to be mid-afternoon when it all goes pear-shaped.

Tgger · 04/10/2010 18:26

errr, just wanted to say you are not alone. My son is gradually getting better, but at 3 or 4pm he was DREADFUL for quite a while. Basically tiredness.
He's almost 4 now and behaviour has improved recently. I think he just doesn't get quite so tired now he's a bit older and is also able to manage his emotions better.
He napped for ages and it's been a long tranisition not napping (only stopped napping at 3.5 or older if you count any naps a week). I'm looking forward to when he's 5 as I can say it taking to then to get over it fully!!!
Fingers crossed for you x

EdgarAllInPink · 04/10/2010 18:32

DD has just started nursery - she is horrible if she doesn't sleep afterwards.

we left afternoon playgroup after she caused another child damage - today it was better because she'd had a nap before. much better.

she loves nursery and I'm very glad she's going - it's just after she is totally beyond anything.

i talked to the other mums about it and they'd all had the same thing - so don't worry! - i was envisaging my daughter as a tiny tearaway last week, but so far this week, so good...

touches wood

mashmash · 10/10/2010 08:21

I've changed my DS sessions to the afternoons. Then it is home, cbeebies, play, dinner, bath, bed. I just got fed up with the mid afternoon tantrum/tired time that came after morning sessions.

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