24 weeks on

[nothingbyhalves]

Just need to unburden if thats ok, and be a little self indulgent. My fab twin boys were born at 31 +1 after my waters going at 25+3 and my being in hospital for a month. I had a emergency c section, and didn't see my boys for 3 hours after they were born as they were taken straight to scbu. They were there for 5 weeks.

Its now 24 weeks down the line and Its now i'm starting to feel down. When the boys were in scbu i just drove myself on and on.
I've also had no real support from family since I've been home and DH works 50 miles away from where we live so does as much as he can, but is out of the house for 12 hours every day!

I'm due to go back to work in 2 weeks as its the only way we can afford to pay the mortgage, but really don't feel ready at all. My boys are still having lots of follow ups, but are fine and a constant joy to me!

I sometimes feel so overwhelmed by everything that has happened. Its almost like i didn't deal with it at the time because I knew I had to strong, so now i'm dealing with it. Fed up with feeling teary. I also feel like I need some help. Just someone to say We'll take the boys out for the morning,so I can clean the house!

How the hell am I going to cope with work as well as the day to day stuff? I see so many other Mums having a year ofand feel so jealous. How the hell do they afford it. I've stopped going the the twin groups as I was the only one who worked at all and felt so resentful.

As i said, self indulgent! Sorry

I don't think you are self indulgent. It's just hard and I often feel that its very lonely having a prem baby (and I only have one let alone twins) as no-one else seems to be in the same boat. Unfortunately I don't have any practial advice (I am still waiting to get to a point where I feel less down and more normal). Personally I want to go back to work, but I know I'm the unusual one. I find getting out and about is very important even when I do feel the odd one out when I do go out. Hang in there an hold onto the joy of your boys.

Thanks, I do get out every day unles its raining. I loved the term "the joy of your boys" One day we will feel normal i guess. hope its coming soon. Enjoy the joy of your little one too. x

Nothing, you sound really down. Would it be worth having a chat with your doctor? It might be a good idea to chat through how you are feeling with someone.

Your post is not self indulgent - you need a hand!

I know some colleges send students on childcare courses on placements, could you contact your local college and see if you can get help for a few hours a week to give you some breathing space?

I find it works if I take my twins to groups where there are mums with slightly older kids (toddler age) as they are all desperate to hold a baby and I get some hand free time

Do you have friends who you could ask to help, even if for a couple of hours a week?
Amazing how much housework you can get done in a couple of hours!

You have been through an awful lot - month in hospital, c sect, prem babies, twins (!), husband working far away, no family.....that's a lot for anyone to cope with.

What area of the country are you in?

we are in South Wales. All my friends have babies of their own to deal with, and the ones who don't have enough on their plates, one does walk the dogs for us when we need it. Going to twin group today!

Oh good, I hope people held the boys for you.

How about the Sure Start thing ( I think it's called) where you get a college placement student?

We have dogs too, 2 dogs, 2 cats, 2 kids!

We don't live in a sure start area, as the government has cut funding! Have decided to look for houses closer to dh work and his family who (although do my head in) are likely to be a lot more supportive than mine.

boys were held. Thanks for your support! hope life is good for you!

Life is good, I have a very supportive mum, luckily.
Hope the move will work, and won't be too stressful!

Does your area have Homestart if they don't have Surestart? Have a look into that, they can send someone round once a week to help out with twins and triplets.