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Premature birth

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baby not saying mama dada, when to worry?

7 replies

sabi10 · 20/06/2008 21:33

Hi
just dont know where else to turn to as dh thinks im worrying too much and Gp has tells me he wouldn't be worried unless he was 2.
My lo is 11 and half months old , but was born at 29 weeks prematuely so has a corrected age of 9 months to the day. .He is not saying mama, dadda etc at all which all the books say hes should be now.I am worried sick as a so called friend (whos never actually met my lo)has told me that lack of this at this stage is mostly caused by mental retardation as she phrased it!he is prem so is high risk she tells me.
Hes a very happy little boy ,very alert and into everything, sat up at 6 month corrected. backward crawling, tummy cammando crawling and rolling everywhere.he can get from lying to sitting himself and vice versa, finger feeds(infact demants those organic crispthings when he sees the bag i keep them in), very socaibale and loves peek aboo and pat a cake. in fact the only thing worrying me is his speech.).He says da and ba. He blows rasberries, clicks, imitates coughs. coos alot and does alot of sing song vowel sounds with a few constents .he makes more contsents when he has his fingers in his mouth . Just no constents together yet. like mama or dada. he seems to understands his name, loves nursey rhymes, and puts his hands up to be picked up, claps,and waves bye.
Was not to worried before,just so proud of what hes doing. just thought it might be that he was prem(he had no major problems in nicu),. He also had a bad ear infection 3 months ago and burst his ear drum which has rehealed and his hearing test then was ok. He had started to say da. ba but stopped 2 weeks ago with another ear infection but is restating to say da and boo just today. Can having ear infections in which he hears ok ie turns to his name and laughs at nursey rhymes effect his babbling? he still is pulling his ear but the gp says the ear infection has gone.
The other thing is my parents are spanish and we spend about week a month with them and we speak no english.speak only english to the lo at other times. read somewhere that can delay things. again never thought this would be a problem.
please give me your honest opinons, managed to get an appoint to see the pead in 2 weeks but am driving my self mad by googling mental retardation and speech delay.
excuse the spelling and grammer.
thakinh you so much

OP posts:
LiegeAndLief · 20/06/2008 21:46

Don't worry. Your friend is ill-informed and tactless!

My ds was born at 34 weeks and has always been a little behind his peers, but that's nothing to worry about and he gets there in the end. I used to worry about it but now he is nearly 2 I have given up! Your ds sounds completely normal. Mine didn't babble until very late but is starting to speak now (still a little behind his peers but I know from experience he will catch up soon).

If you are worried I'm sure it is best to get him checked with the paed, but really he sounds like he's doing brilliantly to me.

TotalChaos · 20/06/2008 21:48

jeez she's not much of a friend saying stuff like that! Google is not your friend so put it away. If you look at this site, babies would not be expected to say mama/dada till 10-11 months at least. (this is of course uncorrected age).

www.aafp.org/afp/990600ap/3121.html

Everything else you describe - waving, putting hands up, understanding name, sounds like his communication development is coming along very nicely. So speak to the paed by all means about this, but try not to worry.

btw these days the phrase "mental retardation" isn't really used much - think it's more usually termed "global developmental delay".

ArrietyClock · 20/06/2008 22:01

It's always worth speaking to your paed for reassurance, but honestly, you lo sounds great to me. More advanced than mine was!

Actually I'm quite envious that yours is going to end up bilingual if you speak two languages to him. I believe you are right that that can delay things a little - certainly some friends of mine found that their daughter was a bit slower as she was learning 2 languages, plus they moved country in the middle of it all - but it's not suprising as there are two words to learn for everything. But the advantage of speaking 2 languages for life far far outweighs the fact that your lo may be a couple of months behind someone else's child, so I certainly wouldn't worry about that aspect.

sabi10 · 20/06/2008 22:17

thanks for your sppedy replies feel better,
so so sorry. should have checked the proper phrase just quoted what my friend said. sorry again if i offended anyone. I had a daughter born at 24 weeks 2 years ago but so sadly she was too special to say with us and passed away the same day. after this baby have a diagnosis of a weak cervix. Feel so guilty aboutmy body and everything i worry i will miss something with my little boy. irrational i know. normally control this anxity and really enjoy motherhood but my friends comments just wouldnt go away. like i say i normally am amazed at what my lo is doing not what he is not. he is such a miracle and we are truly blessed and so lucky.
and yes my so called friend is a bitch and i am going to not speak to her as she makes me feel like shit. had already decided that but thanks for the clarity.

OP posts:
TotalChaos · 20/06/2008 22:20

sorry to hear you lost your baby girl.

no worries about the terminology, particularly seeing as I guess english isn't your first language, it isn't always easy to know how to put things.

BeachBunni · 21/06/2008 12:46

Oh my goodness sabi - I can't believe a 'friend' would say that to you. My cousin's lo is a year old and has only started to say mama and dada and he was born full-term and very ahead with crawling and walking.

Lizzylou · 21/06/2008 12:53

Sabi, your DS sounds fine!
I have two boys, both born at term, both completely different with their speech. DS1 said very little until 2yrs old, he babbled a lot, said random words but his speech was nowhere near as good as his peers, he was very early walking and could obviously understand us. DS2 was late crawling/walking but speaking well at 16mths.
Neither are brighter than the other, just very different and both are lovely.
Your friend doesn't sound very supportive or helpful, comments like that are thoughtless at best.
Please don't worry, and what a lucky boy to be brought up bilingually

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