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Premature birth

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MIL

5 replies

CMC13 · 23/07/2025 15:26

So my MIL keeps telling my partner who the babies need to go and see. They're 3 weeks old and still tiny as they were born at 36 weeks. She doesn't talk to her mum as they don't get on but she keeps banging on about my partner taking them up there. He also has said he doesn't really want anything to do with her as she's not a nice person (I've also never met her as he's kept me away) She has now what I feel like is guilt tripped him into saying his nan is dying. I've said we'll take them in a few weeks when they're more settled and bigger. Its just constant control over who his parents want them to meet and when. It's really affecting our relationship because he's listening to them and not me as their mother. I feel like he's taking all control over what I want away from me and giving it to them. Not what I need at the moment when I'm trying navigate being a ftm.

OP posts:
Coffeeishot · 23/07/2025 15:28

So your childrens dad doesn't get on with his mum but she wants to see the babies ?

Coffeeishot · 23/07/2025 15:29

I mean they are his children as well as yours

CMC13 · 23/07/2025 15:35

@Coffeeishot No, I mean his nan doesn't get on with my partners mum but shes telling him to take our children up there. My partner has also stated in the past he wants nothing to do with his nan..they are his as well but we agreed no rush to see family that don't bother with us as they are a low birth weight and premature. Still not at there due date yet. Plus I'm recovering from a csection so don't want to be traveling unnecessary journeys. I agreed in a few weeks. It's the MIL pressuring him into visiting family that's annoying me, they aren't her children.

OP posts:
Coffeeishot · 23/07/2025 16:18

Right i understand now your post confused me, if he doesn't want to see his gran that is fine, your mil is excited she wants to share the joy of her grandchildren, just tune her out and visit people when you are ready, although just be careful you don't become over protective of them.

BunnyRuddington · 30/08/2025 07:05

@CMC13how are things now? I can understand you being upset that your DP is listening to family more than you and what’s best for your recovery and the health of the babies.

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