Friend had baby at 28 weeks - what to get her.

[gemloving]

Hiya, my friend had her baby prematurely. They're having a really tough time and I feel so helpless.

I want to create a box for her with lots of little things. Any ideas what I could get her? Xx

Can you knit? Tiny bonnets are hard to come by when there tiny, I was lucky my DS was born in the SCBU and there were plastic containers full of knitted donations.

Otherwise, tiny nappies, little blankets or tiny booties?

It's lovely you're thinking of helping her, she'll be really grateful I'm sure.

My friend when my son was born gave us a box full of wee quick things to eat and made us dinner the first night he came home. Also came round so I could have a proper shower. It was the small things but I loved them.

Make some meals they can freeze and pull out. Or Cook do a new parents pack which I would have loved x

Food.

if she’s in and out of hospital- a cooked meal she can warm through at home, or healthy food to eat in hospital. You end up living off meal deals and cafeteria crap- and if you don’t manage to get away in opening hours it’s vending machine… graze boxes, nuts, fruit etc.

hand cream. Good stuff- you’re constantly washing hands so they get dry.

dry shampoo, baby wipes, basic hygiene stuff, if she can’t get away from the ward that becomes difficult.

old school but magazines- something to flick through when your attention span is shit but you need your mind occupying.

Handcream. Mine weren't born so early and were only on SCBU for a short time, but I found the constant handwashing ruined my hands.

When my baby was born early the gift I loved most was a little book called "your new baby: an owner's manual" or something like that. It's a small, cheap jokey book that really brightened the long days in NICU.

Otherwise, all I wanted was food. Snacks of all kinds to munch on while I sat around. Once we were home some friends brought around five days worth of home cooked dinners which were a lifeline. You could possibly so that so they have something nice to eat in NICU.

Baby clothes were good, but only the vests and baby-gros - a premie in an incubator doesn't have much use for nice outfits. Also, ideally get the vests that open up down the front as these are easier to manage around all the wires and tubes.

I personally wouldn't have wanted hand cream or other care products as I don't use them but they're a common request.

My best gift when I had a premmie on nicu was a big basket of cakes. I was recovering from birth and somehow my body knew it needed to express goldtop to fatten up my tiny baby (it was amazing to see actually - the bottles in the fridge started off a deep yellow and when the fat floated to the top it was about 75% of the bottle; the milk got paler and less fatty over time).

How about some practical gifts like a mini phone charger for at the hospital, snacks and cereal bars to eat on the go, an offer of lifts to the hospital, does she need change for parking or vending machines, a voucher so she can shop whilst sat on the ward.

I had twins at 27 weeks - your friend is in for a long ride in NICU/SCBU. My best present was a notebook and pen - I ended up keeping a kind of diary, it was something to do whilst I sat on the ward - positive comments the doctors had said, how much milk they were having. On the really bad days (and there will be some) it was so helpful to look back to things I'd written in previous days/weeks and realise how far they'd come. Also, now, my DD has a little printer than can print photos off her phone - the hospital took photos for me when mine were born back in the day that I could have next to me on the ward (apparently it also helps with expressing milk to be able 'see' the baby) - I can't remember how much they cost but an idea maybe. Wish her luck x

What a kind thing to do @gemloving .

How are they both getting on now?

There are tiny tiny baby clothes available online - I got some for a friend’s early baby and they were appreciated when he was able to wear some.

A care package - a luxury mini shower gel, Spacemasks, a few perfume samples, a luxury deodorant, hand cream, little can of dry shampoo? All nice to have when stuck in hospital or at least, in hospital a lot.